Today is my Mom’s 57th birthday. (She’s the little one at left). I won’t be seeing her today to celebrate because we are currently crossing paths in the skies between California and Ohio. I am heading there and she is heading home. Before she left, she had been talking up a blue streak about the trip she had already taken there a few weeks ago, as well as about the preparations and plans for the one she is coming home from now. I’m sure she’ll have lots of stories and tiny details to tell us and everyone else. Denise and I will hear the stories upteen times each and will give each other a knowing glance every time she starts to tell it again.
Yes, Denise and I make fun of Mom all the time. She has several hilarious quirks that we always pick on. We’ll hear the same stories told over and over again – usually with unwarranted drama. During the course of the conversation, she’ll say the wrong word and then correct it with “I don’t mean xx, I mean yy.” (For example – the other day she was telling Ashleigh and I how she was able to get into nightclubs when she was 18, she said “We all used to go to the 18…I don’t mean 18, I mean nightclubs” ) Ashleigh, too, often joins in on the fun. Sometimes, we hand her things just to see if she’ll take them from us, and she’ll end up carrying them for a while. She can really get us laughing, and usually join in herself, before finally pleading “Stop picking on me!”
Somehow, though, we can get away with doing these things and not feel disrespectful, because she is so much like a friend to both of us. Others who are lucky enough to be pals with their Mom know how lucky they feel when they are able to call on her to do just about anything for or with them. I still enjoy just going over for a visit, watching a movie, going out to eat, going swimming, and especially going on vacations with my Mom.
If you know Denise and me, you might wonder just what kind of upbringing we had. We are both terminally silly and, at times, out of control – but overall we are both good folks. Successful in our careers and our jobs as parents, we were both raised admiring the independent spirit of Mom and learned how to manage our own lives from her example.
Mom has really always amazed me. Her presence in our home growing up – and even just visiting her now – makes me feel safe. I could sometimes feel lonely even when there are other people in the house, but when Mom is there, it just feels like there’s a flurry of activity going on. I don’t know how else to describe it. She could take a Saturday afternoon at home cleaning, cooking, playing a game with us, and watching TV, and make it feel like time has stood still. I guess I’m saying she can accomplish in one afternoon what I might draw out over the course of a week’s time. Most importantly, she made our house a home.
I think that Mom, even as a youngster and teenager, was always the good girl. She didn’t want a whole lot out of life – just her family and a family of her own. She didn’t party a lot and never got into trouble. She stayed active in sports and school activities as a kid – and was active in Denise’s and my school activities and sports as a parent. Nowadays, she still participating in sports – continuing to play volleyball and softball.
When my parents separated and later divorced, she became the driving force that had to keep up the house, finances, and the job of raising two teenagers – ones who were bound and determined not to make the job easy. 
Teenage pregnancies, insane stalkers, teen depression, wild parties, suicidal boyfriends, and bailing my friends out of jail all lent to the chaos.
But in the end, she persevered and continued to focus on Denise and me, and is now enjoying the fruits of her labor. Two grandkids, a good husband, a nice house, and a good job (which she talks about way too much – but we still love her) are all the rewards for doing such a great job with her life. And she still enjoys helping us out. Even now, she is staying with Ashleigh so that I can take a vacation without worries.
Mom, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I love you. I’ll see you when I get back and we can exchange California stories.
Continue with 2007 in California…
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