The Terrible Catsafterme

SEASON 1 – CBS

Created by Freeman Gosden and Charles Correll

NOTE: The series was based on characters created by Freeman Gosden and Charles Correll, who performed the roles of Amos and Andy on the radio show “Amos ‘n Andy” from 1928-1943 as a nightly radio serial, from 1943-1955 as a weekly situation comedy, and from 1954-1960 as a nightly variety show called “The Amos ‘n’ Andy Music Hall”. Additionally Gosden and Correll appeared in a 1930 film as the characters in “Check and Double Check”. 

Theme music: “Angel’s Serenade” by Gaetano Braga, performed by the Jeff Alexander Chorus

• 001. Kingfish Gets Drafted – 6/28/1951
  • George “Kingfish” Stevens (Tim Moore), the leader of the Mystic Knights of the Sea lodge in New York City, is mistaken for a 19-year old man with the same name and is sent an army draft notification, where he shares this news with his friend Andrew Hogg Brown (Spencer Williams, Jr.). Andy suggests that Kingfish see his lawyer Algonquin J. Calhoun (Johnny Lee), who suggests that the best recourse would be to have Kingfish’s wife Sapphire Smith Stevens (Ernestine Wade) make a plea to the draft board on his behalf. This doesn’t work as planned, because Sapphire thinks Kingfish has volunteered and is thrilled with his patriotism. Kingfish then decides to go into the army but is then informed by Mr. Thompson (Vince Townsend) from the draft board that his draft notice was mistake. He tries to enlist in all branches of the service, but is rejected on all fronts. The lodge throws a big party for Kingfish attended by Andy, their friends taxi driver Amos Jones (Alvin Childress), and Henry Van Porter (Jester Hairston) who presents Kingfish with an expensive watch. Kingfish later tells Henry that he will be assigned to the 135th outfit, based on a street sign that he sees. When the real 135th outfit is shipped out to Fort Bragg, Kingfish begins hiding in the lodge basement. Sapphire and her Mama Ramona Smith (Amanda Randolph) start to head off to see Kingfish, but when he finds out, he has Andy pose as Western Union and tell Sapphire that he is on furlough and will be coming home. Kingfish designs a makeshift military outfit to wear home, but the plans are foiled when a report phones Sapphire for statement about her husband shipping out overseas. This prompts Sapphire and Mom to beat Kingfish so severely that he winds up in the hospital. Nick Stewart aka Nick O’Demus plays Lighnin’ the janitor at the lodge hall. Corny Anderson is Walters. Zelda Cleaver is Mrs. Jackson. 6/2/18

• 002. Kingfish’s Secretary – 7/5/1951
  • Brother Higgins passes away and leaves $1200 to the lodge, which Kingfish uses to redecorate and hire a lovely young secretary named Daphne Jackson (Jeni Le Gon). Sapphire is furious with Kingfish and even more jealous when she sees Daphne, whom Kingfish has described as looking like an old shoe. Kingfish also allows Daphne to be a public stenographer, and types up a letter for a customer (Samuel McDaniel) who found a woman named Henrietta Smith (Ruby Dandridge) in a matrimonial column who wants to send for his new bride. Thanks to Lightnin’ mixing up this letter with one of Kingfish’s letters looking for a ‘scrubbing woman’, Kingfish accidentally signs the customer’s letter and sends it off. Henrietta gets the letter, sells her farm in Georgia, and heads off to New York City, where Kingfish mistakes her for the scrubbing woman. When she makes her intentions known, Kingfish and Andy flee the lodge, prompting Henrietta to hire a private detective (Ned Wertimer) to track him down. Andy and Kingfish try disguising themselves so that Kingfish can get home, but when his beard falls off, they are forced to hide in trash cans. Unbeknownst to Kingfish, Sapphire rents their spare room to Henrietta. They keep missing each other in the kitchen as Henrietta repeatedly eats Kingfish’s snacks when he leaves the room. When he finds out that Henrietta is the tenant, he flees before breakfast, and has Calhoun handle Henrietta. Despite being beaten by her, he is able to convince her to accept the fare back to Georgia and forget the whole thing. Amos takes Henrietta to the train station, and Kingfish lectures Daphne about looking before she leaps. Sapphire comes in to apologize for being jealous of Daphne, and overhears him telling her to never mentioning anything about proposing to another woman, prompting another beating from Sapphire. 6/2/2018
• 003. The Young Girl’s Mother – 7/12/1951
  • Andy is trapped in an elevator with a young beauty contest winner named Brenda (Millie Bruce) for hours, and after they get to know each other, Andy begins courting her, and finally proposes marriage. Recounting his previous relationships with Kingfish, Andy tells him the story of one former girlfriend named Madame Queen (Lillian Randolph) who had once taken Andy to court when she felt he jilted her. Later Andy agrees to go to Georgia to meet Andy’s mother, and upon arrival sees Madame Queen’s picture inscribed to her daughter… Brenda. Andy flees the scene and leaves behind his hat, which Queen immediately recognizes. Kingfish tells Andy that this was a good thing because Brenda will surely wind up looking and acting like her mother. When they finally all meet face to face, all Andy can see when he looks at Brenda is Queen, and he goes into hiding. While Kingfish and Calhoun plan a mock funeral for Andy to get Queen off his back, Amos convinces Andy to face the music and simply tell Brenda that he isn’t going to marry her. Andy arrives as Queen is attending the funeral and mourning his ‘death’, but once she sees him, she beats him to a pulp and puts him in a wheelchair. Andy vows to forget about dating…until he sees a pretty girl and rolls his chair after her. Maceo Bruce Sheffield is the man in the park interrupting Andy’s date with Brenda. 6/16/18
• 004. The Rare Coin – 7/19/1951
  • Andy finds an 1877 nickel in an old trunk and writes coin dealer John Wilton (Walter Kingsford) to find the value. However Kingfish intercepts the later stating that the coin is worth $250. After consorting with Henry, Kingfish pretneds he’s taking a correspondence course to become a doctor in order to get Andy to take his pants off so that he can swipe the nickel. He tells Andy that he might have an inflammation of the ‘optimistic nerve’ and is going blind, and needs to diagnose him by having him remove his pants and get into a robe. He tells Andy he needs to rest his eyes, and covers them in gauze while he rummages through the pants and steals the nickel. He calls Wilton to tell him he has the coin, but accidentally uses it on the pay phone at the drugstore. Andy is furious when he finds out the ruse, but Kingfish is able to sweet talk Andy into being the one to pry the telephone box off the wall. They end up getting arrested by a plainclothes officer named Roy (Roy Glenn) and wind up in court. Calhoun tries to represent them, but the judge (Vince Townsend) recognizes him as a lawyer that he had previously disbarred. As the judge is getting ready to sentence them, Amos and Roy intervene and tell the judge the whole story about the nickel. The judge lets them off with a warning, and now in possesion of the coin, they head out to sell it, a reluctant Andy agreeing to split the money with Kingfish. However he puts the nickel in a payphone again, arousing the anger of Kingfish, who storms out. Andy then asks for a wrong number, and when the operator tells him the number doesn’t exist, Andy asks her to return his nickel. Corny Anderson is the Bailiff. 7/7/18
• 005. Kingfish Has a Baby – 7/26/1951
  • Amos relates how Sapphire had previously walked out on Kingfish in the past – for coming home at 2am, and for staring at a girl at a Christmas party. This time she has left again and after four days, Kingfish is beside himself with worry. He and Andy go visit Sapphire’s Mama, but she has no use for Kingfish and won’t tell him where she is. Lightnin’ however spots Sapphire on the street and follows her into the hospital and into the room of Obstetrician Henry M. Jackson. Once Kingfish figures out what an obstetrician is by calling and trying to make an appointment for himself, he assumes that he is going to have a baby. Sapphire meanwhile phones her mom to tell her that she thinks she will be hired by Jackson to babysit his 18-month son Johnny. Amos warns Kingfish what a tremendously difficult job it will be to be a father, so Kingfish decides to get a job and make something of himself. He gets a job shoveling coal, and visits a nurse (Verna Felton) for instruction on how to care for a newborn… but he and Andy get thrown out when they rip apart a babydoll. When Kingfish and Andy follow Sapphire, they spot her going into St. John’s Hospital to pick up Johnny, and Kingfish thinks she has gone in, given birth, and is now pushing around their baby in a carriage. Kingfish gets a closer look at the baby and assumes he is so especially big because he is his son. He invites Sapphire back home and delivers the big news about his new job, and tells her that the three of them will be very happy together. Sapphire has no idea what Kingfish means by ‘three of them’ but ends up assuming incorrectly and inviting Mama to live with them. 1/5/19
• 006. Counterfeiters Rent the Basement – 8/2/1951
  • The Kingfish puts an ad in the newspaper to rent the room below the lodge, which is quickly answered by a group of counterfeiters led by a gangster named Duke (John Hoyt). Andy attempts to clean up the basement, and with Kingfish’s help, they manage to turn a small hole in the wall into a huge one as they try to cover the holes with paintings. The counterfeiters move in and begin printing up a batch of $20 bills, hiding a box of them worth $10,000 behind the press. Kingfish and Andy go downstairs to look over their operation but suspect nothing, even when Andy gets caught in the press and gets a picture of Andrew Jackson embossed on his shirt. Unfortunately he leaves a box of candy in the room that is intended for his girlfriend Caroline, whose mother (Lillian Randolph) thinks that Andy is no good. He has Lightnin’ go downstairs to retrieve the candy and deliver it to Caroline, but Lightnin’ grabs the box of fake money instead. This changes Caroline’s mother’s opinion of Andy, as she begins spending it all over town. Eventually a store manager recognizes it as counterfeit, causing Caroline to break it off with Andy in a rage. Andy and Kingfish put the information together and call the police, but the call is intercepted by Duke, who heads to the lodge and holds Andy, Kingfish, and Calhoun at gunpoint, demanding to know where the money is. He ends up taking Andy at gunpoint to find the money, and the police eventually arrive telling Kingfish that there is a $1500 reward for the counterfeiters capture. Andy fully intends to get the reward too, since he directed Duke to grab the money from the press, causing him to get trapped in the press like Andy had been. Will Wright is Jennings. James Flavin is the police sergeant. 1/7/19
• 007. Sapphire Disappears – 8/9/1951
  • Kingfish calls Amos and Andy in a panic because Sapphire has disappeared from the apartment, leaving all of her clothes behind. Amos tries to call over to Sapphire’s mother, but she won’t answer the phone. She has actually snatched up Sapphire to take her to Miami to stay with Sapphire’s sister for a couple of months in Miami, hoping it will jar Kingfish to his senses and he will get a respectable job. She buys Sapphire a new wardrobe and throws out the clothes she is wearing that Kingfish had bought for her, Mama rents out her apartment to Police Lieutenant Davis (Maceo Bruce Sheffield) with the burglary detail. Andy and Kingfish head to Mama’s place in Brooklyn, and after bungling their way into the apartment find that it is obviously inhabited by a man due to the discovery of a shaver and a cigar. Davis comes home and they are forced to take refuge in the shower, then jump out the window. Fearing the worst, Kingfish sends Lightnin’ over to the apartment to snoop around and after getting stuck in a trash can, discovers Sapphire’s discarded wardrobe. Kingfish then sends Calhoun to the homicide division to demand they take action, but the Sergeant (Amos Reese) finds Calhoun’s file and has him arrested. Finally Kingfish and Andy visit David again, and this time discover him building boxes in the cellar. Convinced he has murdered them and is burning the bodies, they pose as Gallup Poll employees Mr. Gallup and Mr. Poll and ask him questions about his furnace. He slams the door in their face, and Kingfish returns to the lodge to lament Sapphire being in heaven. However, she phones him from Miami and says she is ‘down here’ so he assumes that it isn’t heaven after all. 1/5/20
• 008. The Winslow Woman – 8/16/1951
  • Kingfish is irritated that Sapphire has been spending time with Elizabeth Winslow (Willa Pearl Curtis) from her woman’s club, but Kingfish suddenly becomes interested when he finds out that Winslow has come into $20,000. Kingfish immediately visits Andy to see if he would like to court her, but he considers her to be a toad. However, he quickly changes his mind as well when he finds out about the money. Sapphire assures Kingfish that there’s no way she would be interested in a loafer like Andy, so Kingfish orchestrates dressing Andy up and dubbing him Baron von Brownspiegel of Austria. Andy wines and dines her, and successfully courts her until she accepts his marriage proposal. Meanwhile, a man claiming to be Elizabeth’s long estranged husband (Bill Walker) is given a ride in Amos’s taxi. Amos warns Andy, and they all go to Calhoun for advice. The first Mr. Winslow also meets with Calhoun and demands $1000 to step out of the picture, as he is only interested in money. Andy and Kingfish scrape all of the money from the lodge fund to come up with the payoff, but it is revealed that Elizabeth and her husband had set them up to swindle the $1000 of them, and they then boarded a train out of town. 1/7/20
• 009. The Gun – 8/23/1951
  • Amos heads to the courthouse, and explains the audience why Kingfish is in trouble again. Sapphire is hinting to Kingfish that it is their 20th anniversary, but when he doesn’t get it, she wallops him upside the head. He tries to make up for it by purchasing a $6 purse at the Bon Ton Variety Store. Little does he know that a gangster (John Doucette) and his moll have ditched her purse with a gun in it while being chased by the police. When he and Andy get the purse back to the office, they find the gun, which Kingfish then intends to sell. He tosses the purse out the window because he plans to buy a bigger, better gift with the money he gets from the gun. However the purse lands in the flowers just outside the ledge. He heads to Anderson’s pawn shop with the gun – which Sapphire spots sticking out of his pants – but when he pulls it out, Mrs. Anderson faints dead away thinking she is being robbed. Kingfish doesn’t realize that she believed that until he and Andy read about the ‘robbery attempt’ in the paper. Kingfish dreams of escaping to the Foreign Legion, a deserted island, or sailing across the seas. However he is thrown in jail when Sapphire reads the newspaper and turns him in. In the courtroom, Calhoun attempts to defend him but is thrown out when he fires the gun several times into the ceiling accidentally. In light of the missing purse to corroborate Kingfish’s story, the judge Herbert L. Watkins (Morris Ankrum) recesses until the following day. As Andy and Amos discuss the case, the missing purse falls onto Andy. In light of the evidence, the judge dismisses the case, but warns him about carrying a gun or attempting to sell on in New York where such things are illegal. Kingfish responds that if the situation arises again, he’ll attempt to sell it in New Jersey. Roy Glenn is the District Attorney. James Adamson is the bailiff. 4/16/20
• 010. Call Lehigh 4-9900 – 8/30/1951
  • An ambulance pulls up at Kingfish’s residence and rushes a stretcher inside, where Amos is standing by to relate the story that began three days earlier. Sapphire is cleaning the house and has filled he living room with junk that she tells Kingfish to take the furnace. Instead he takes it to Andy and attempts to sell it to him. They find a tag inside one of the jacket pockets that says to Call Lehigh 4-9900 for the ‘Best in Town’ at ‘No Charge.’ Although he doesn’t know what they are offering, he calls to express hi interest. It turns out that he has called a Lonely Hearts Club. The secretary (Zelda Cleaver) leaves a message for the company’s proprietor R.J. Cunningham (Sam McDaniel). Andy and Kingfish leave for lunch and Sapphire comes to the lodge to retrieve him for more work, and takes the return call from Cunningham. She is ready to move out, but Kingfish convinces her of the truth. Meanwhile Cunningham sends over a girl named Carlotta Drake (Jeni Le Gon) who is looking for companionship. Andy finds her at the lodge and when he finds out who she is, he pretends that he is Kingfish, who is back at home on thin ice scrubbing the floors for Sapphire. Adam continues to date Carlotta and lavish her with gifts. While Sapphire is at Madame Olga’s Beauty Salon, she winds up seated next to Carlotta who talks about her dreamboat George Stevens with whom she will be attending a dance that night. When Kingfish returns home from the lodge meeting that night, he is served divorce papers via Sapphire’s lawyer Mr. Prescott (Vince Townsend Jr.). They meet with the judge (George Hamilton) and declares them legally separated. The couple meet with their lawyers to divide up their community property, and they begin to reminisce about their good old days, but devolve into fighting over who is the most sentimental of the two. After they are separated, Amos finds another number on the back of the card that he had gotten the Lonely Hearts number, which belonged to a hair treatment emporium. Amos tells Sapphire the whole story and she agrees to take him back. However when she calls the number that Kingfish had written down, it now belonged to a different company: Lenox Burlesque Theatre. Shortly after Kingfish arrives to reconcile with Sapphire, he is taken out on a stretcher. Amos warns the audience not to try to find out what mysterious phone numbers in your pocket belong to. Rosalind Hayes is Mr. Prescott’s secretary. 4/16/20
• 011. Leroy Lends a Hand – 9/6/1951
  • Kingfish is annoyed when he gets news from Sapphire that her brother Leroy Smith (Jester Hairston) is coming to stay with them for an extended visit. Kingfish puts him to work right away cleaning off a neighboring lot. Andy suggests that the lot would make a great parking lot, so Kingfish and Andy pool their money and have it paved and open it up as a lot. Charging 25 cents per car, they decide there must be a way to get more money out of customers. When they go to lunch, Leroy agrees to watch over the lot. With instructions to get as much money as he can, and thinking that it is a used car lot, he sells a Ford Convertible for $600. When the customer Mr. Peterson (Amos Reese) returns for his car, he is furious when Kingfish and Andy cannot find it. They have no idea what has happened, until they find the money in the cash register and call over Calhoun to explain it to them. He helps them call Mr. Peterson to tell them that the car was sold and they have the $600 for it, but Peterson maintains that the car cost $800. Kingfish is furious and yells at Leroy that he needs that car back. Kingfish and Andy go to Amos to see if he can help them with the money, but he suggests they visit some loan agencies. Everyone turns them down except the Helping Hands Loan Co., but the loan officer (John Brown) has Andy give him $200 security which he then simply gives back to Kingfish. After leaving, they realize they have no more money than they started with, and prepare to go to jail. However when Kingfish goes back to the lot, he finds that Leroy had retrieved Peterson’s Ford. Kingfish is thrilled with Leroy and tells Sapphire to throw him a party. This is short-lived when he finds out Leroy had traded a Cadillac off the lot to get the Ford back, and now the Cadillac owner has shown up to claim her car. 7/31/20
• 012. The Fur Coat – 9/13/1951
  • Amos relates the tale of how one morning Kingfish starts a fight with Sapphire after she cooks him a particularly pathetic egg breakfast. She says she is going to go stay with her mother in Chicago, and he is all for it. He brings over Andy to help tend to the household chores, but soon he begins to miss her and decides to get a job as a delivery boy for the Sales Department Store. He starts work, and then sends Sapphire a letter telling her that he has a big surprise for her. He continues working all week on his feet making deliveries. One packages recipient isn’t home, so he takes the box home to try the next day, and opens it to find a beaver fur coat inside. Sapphire does in fact come home and brings her mother along, only to find the fur coat and assume that it is the surprise. Since buying the $1500 is out of the question, he asks Andy to break in and steal it so that Kingfish can return it to the store. Andy makes the attempt, but fails since Sapphire has hidden it in the kitchen cupboard. Kingfish tells his boss (Roy Glenn) that the coat is lost and makes arrangements to hand over half of his salary each week until 1963 to pay it off. The boss suspects he is lying, but goes along with the plan. Later Kingfish learns from Mama that Sapphire has gone to the store to get alterations made. He has Amos drive him and Andy there in order to stop her, but they are delayed by an elevator operator (Rosalind Hayes) when they arrive and are forced to go up seven additional floors and then go down the fire escape. They reach Sapphire just in the nick of time only to find out that she is merely getting alterations made to a dress. Later Sapphire invites her haughty friend Clara Wilson over to show off her new coat to show her that they are just as good as Clara and her husband. Clara is impressed by the coat, but her husband Herman turns out to be Kingfish’s boss who recognizes the coat right away. 7/31/20
• 013. Jewelry Store Robbery – 9/20/1951
  • Kingfish assists with taking pictures of Andy for him to hand out to his girlfriends. At the end of the day, Andy takes a photo of Kingfish in front of Robinson’s jewelry store, where a man named Frankie (Anthony Warde) wanders into the photo. It turns out that he had just robbed the store, and Kingfish reads in the paper that there is $1000 reward waiting for anyone who can help identify him. Kingfish sets his mind on stealing the film from Andy, and tries to set him up at his desk to play canasta under a loose piece of plaster. Instead of falling on Andy, it falls on Kingfish and knocks him out… so Kingfish threatens to sue him for $500, and then tells him about the reward. They attempt to develop the film at several drugstores, but since it will take several days, they decide to try and develop it themselves. Meanwhile, Sapphire tells her friend Clara Van Porter (Zelda Cleaver) about the film that Andy has, and she tells her husband Henry, who tells a random stranger on the subway named Pete, who turns out to be an associate of Frankie. When Frankie finds out, he goes looking for the Kingfish and Andy, who are bumbling their way through developing the film. They temporarily manage to lock Frankie in the darkroom and escape to Madame Olga’s Beauty Salon. Frankie again pursues them, and they escape again, this time dressed as a beautician and customer. Kingfish then makes Andy believe that the film was lost in the commotion, but he has it after all, and sends Calhoun to turn it over to the police and tell them that the robber is the man seen in the last picture. He does just that, and the police end up arresting Kingfish. James Adamson and Amos Reese are the policemen. 11/15/20
• 014. Kingfish’s Last Friend – 9/27/1951
  • The Kingfish is laid up sick, but the doctor diagnoses him with simply over-eating. Still he is upset that no friends came to see him, and Sapphire tells him it is because he has no friends because he’s swindled every one of them. He decides to turn over a new leaf, and he throws away all of the materials he has used to cheat others, including two shares of the fake East Alaskan Canneries. When Andy comes in and tells him that he has some money to invest, the temptation is too great for Kingfish, who pulls the stock certificates from the waste basket and sells them to Andy for $200. That night, Kingfish’s conscience speaks to him, and he wakes up in the middle of the night and tries to buy back the phony stock from Andy. He is suspicious and refuses to sell, but the Kingfish tells him he is doing it because he loves him… and is willing to fight if he won’t accept his love. They fight, and Kingfish winds up with a cut eye. He goes through the same routine with Amos and Calhoun, who won’t accept that he loves him, so they fight. Kingfish gets do distraught that he runs away from home and tries to join the Navy. When he is declined, he moves on and heads to California. Two weeks later, everyone starts to realize that the miss Kingfish, so they take up a $500 reward and offer it for anyone who can find him. The lodge receives a letter from the Baker Detective Agency identifying Kingfish’s whereabouts. They retrieve him and throw him a big party and the post the reward to Detective Baker. The Kingfish goes to be that night and is told by his conscience that he is a good man overall, and that the conscience will be leaving him alone from now on. This works out, as it was George posing as Detective Baker, and he goes to the post office and picks up the reward money. Gene Roth is the steamship officer. 11/16/20
• 015. Andy Buys a House – 10/4/1951
  • The Kingfish has taken a job at the Reynolds and Reynolds real estate company, but on the fourth day of his employ, his boss Mr. Reynolds (Roy Glenn) takes a spin around the office and is please to find everyone working hard… except for Kingfish, who is asleep inside his desk. He is fired on the spot, but when he goes home and Sapphire tells him how proud of him she is and that they can start to look for a house now that he has a steady job, he goes back to beg Mr. Reynolds for his job back. He tells him that he can have his job if he can sell a $500 house that is condemned due to a highway getting ready to go through it. After scouring the phone book for buyers, he winds up selling it to Andy without mentioning that it is condemned. Scared of the repercussions, Kingfish hires a bodyguard named Slugger Johnson to protect him from Andy if he gives him the signal word ‘geronimo’. While Kingfish is getting Lightnin’ to go get Andy, Slugger’s manager Joe (Ben Weldon) tells Slugger to come back for a fight. Therefore when Andy comes full force at Kingfish, the word ‘geronimo’ does nothing. Kingfish softens to Andy and promises to help him find a lot, but the one he comes up with is seven feet too short. At his wit’s end, Andy desperately tries to think of a way to get back at Kingfish. When Kingfish returns home to Sapphire, she tells him that Andy has sold him a beautiful house for $750. James Adamson is Kingfish’s co-worker Thompson, and Amos Reese is his co-worker Tom. 3/5/21
• 016. Amos Helps Out – 10/11/1951
  • Amos narrates a flashback of Kingfish and Sapphire courting and their marriage officiated by Reverend Johnson (Napoleon Simpson) twenty year earlier in Marietta. Back in the present, Kingfish and Sapphire return from a night of dancing, and as he’s insulting her, she’s telling him that she regrets ever marrying him. To get back at her, Kingfish uses a tax letter from Marietta, and substitutes a letter he wrote as if from the Marietta Deputy Clerk of Courts notifying them that their marriage was not valid. Sapphire is shocked, but when Kingfish says they should go their own way, Sapphire jumps on board and throws him out of the apartment. Kingfish quickly realizes he made a mistake and tries to see her, only to spot her dressed like a teenage and going to play tennis with her girlfriends. Kingfish decides he needs to be seen in the company of another woman and digs into Andy’s black book. Sapphire and her mother find out that the letter was fake, and Mama convinces her to be seen the company of another man. She uses an escort service to hire the young Mr. Royal (Davis Roberts), and Kingfish picks up his date Miss Sadie Williams (Rosalind Hayes), and they all head to the Silver Slipper, where they think they will be seen. However when they see each other with younger dates, they both are furious and tell each other they never want to see one another again. Amos offers to talk to Sapphire, but Kingfish forbids him, telling him she is coming over that afternoon to divide up their belongings. While they are packing up, they are visited by Reverend Johnson, who recalls how much they were in love and reminisces about the vows they spoke. This touches both of them… and they promise to see him in church that week… together. Later Reverend Johnson thanks Amos for tipping him off that he should visit them that afternoon. 3/6/21
• 017. Getting Mama Married: Part 1 – 10/18/1951
  • The Kingfish is having a fine day until he comes home and hears from Sapphire that her mother is coming to live with them. He tries to put his foot down, but soon enough, she’s moved in, discussing how successful Sapphire’s old boyfriends have become, locking him out, and causing domestic disturbances. Despite Amos’s suggestion that the Kingfish try being nice to her, he’d rather get rid of her by marrying her off. He learns about a rich guy in town named Hubert Smithers, so he begins fabricating secret admirer letters from Hubert to Ramona, and from Ramona to Hubert, and then finally arranges for them to meet. To try and increase the odds that they hit it off, Kingfish even sends her to the beauty parlor. They are both painfully shy, and the Kingfish has to get them to sit together on the couch by removing one of the chairs and two of the cushions on the couch. Eventually they indeed get along well, and then head off to be married in Eastchester, Connecticut. After they’ve left, Amos finds an article in a detective magazine about Hubert, indicating that he is a ‘love pirate’ who pretends to be rich, then steals the money from women he charms. The Kingfish and Andy head out to try and stop the wedding, but along the way they are forced to help a man who is blocking the road because his tire is flat. They finally get it on, and then wind up with a flat themselves. Meanwhile, Hubert and Ramona show up, but the reverend isn’t there yet. Sure enough, Reverend Carter (Sam McDaniel) shows up, and he is the same man that Andy and Kingfish helped in the road. Andy calls Amos to tell him the update, but they lose the connection, so Amos advises the audience that we all need to wait until next week to see how it turned out. NOTE: This is the first of a two-part episode. 7/3/21
• 018. Getting Mama Married: Part 2 – 10/25/1951
  • The Kingfish and Andy arrive at the church in Eastchester an hour after Mama’s wedding was scheduled to take place. They see her being carried out of the church, since she had slipped on a rose petal and broken her leg before they could be married. While Mama is in the hospital, Kingfish, Amos, and Andy tell Mr. Smithers that he needs to leave town, and he agrees. A Madison, Wisconsin Deputy Sheriff Williams (Amos Reese) comes looking for Smithers, and wants to talk to Mama for running out on a woman in Madison and stealing her money and jewels. The Kingfish desperately wants to keep Sapphire from knowing that he had spent so much money to set her Mama up with a con artist, so he tells she Sheriff not to interview Mama, but the Sheriff demands that he produce Smothers or he will talk to her. In the meantime, a Miss Thompson from Oregon and another woman from Iowa come looking to talk to Mama as well, since they too were jilted by Hubert. Calhoun advises Kingfish to tell all parties that Hubert Smithers died in Niagara Falls on the honeymoon, when he fell over the ledge and into the Falls. He tells Sheriff Willimas that he died, while he tells Miss Thompson that he joined the French Foreign Legion, and a Miss Peabody that he is on a voyage in the Amazon. Finally, he gets a visit from Helena Smithers (Zelda Cleaver), who claims to be Hubert’s wife of 26 years. She works at the Polyclinic where Mama is staying. When the Kingfish and Andy see her there, they shuffle Mama from room to room, accidentally send her on an elevator ride, where she winds up in the maternity ward. They then hide her in a room, that turns out to be Helena’s office. Everyone gets in the same room together, and both Helena and Mama both still want Hubert to be their husband. He says that he will be with whoever wants him more, and leaves for the night. He is next seen with Sheriff Williams riding on a train back to Madison, declaring that he indeed found out who wanted him more. 7/3/21
• 019. The Happy Stevenses – 11/1/1951
  • The Kingfish and Sapphire both agree that since they’ve been listening to the radio show The Happy Harringtons, starring real life couple Harry (Frank Wilcox) and Harriet Harrington (Lois Austin), they’ve been getting along better together. Their blissful morning is cut short when they can’t agree on which episode was better, that morning’s or yesterday morning’s. This devolves into a fight, so Kingfish tells Andy that from now on, he is going to agree with everything Sapphire says. This too leads to a fight, because Sapphire gets annoyed when she thinks he is treating her like a child and doesn’t have an original thought. This time, Kingfish is forced out of the apartment and moves in with Andy. When Andy tells Amos about the predicament, Amos has the idea that maybe they need to each act more like Harry and Harriet. Sapphire and the Kingfish both agree, so Kingfish arranges a night on the town with some classy friends: Andy and his girlfriend Rosemary DeWinters (Jeni Le Gon). The evening goes poorly when Rosemary insults Sapphire’s dress, and then Andy accidentally rips it. Kingfish is thrown out once again, and this time seeks advice from Calhoun, who suggest that they pay a visit to the Harringtons themselves, and get their advice on how they generate happiness. Kingfish makes an appointment to visit them with Sapphire at the CBS radio studios. Unfortunately, once they see them, they find that the Harringtons can’t agree on how they got started in radio, and this devolves into a wicked fight and melee in their dressing room. After all of the commotion is over, the radio announcer introduces the Stevenses on the air, who take over the day’s episode of the radio show, thanks to the fight that the Harringtons had. 12/29/21
• 020. Traffic Violation – 11/8/1951
  • The Kingfish receives a $250 insurance dividend, and despite Sapphire’s warning not to blow it, the Kingfish buys a car from a lot that immediately goes out of business once he drives off the lot. The car quickly explodes and catches fire. Kingfish attempts to sell the car to Andy despite being badly scorched, but the best Andy will do is go in for $15o so that they can share the car once Kingfish has it repaired. Once it is completed, Andy takes it for the first week, then Kingfish takes it for the second. While Kingfish has the car, he manages to get himself four traffic violations. The judge (Pierre Watkin) tells him that if he gets one more, he’ll wind up in jail for 30 days. Sure enough, the Kingfish crashes into a fire hydrant and gets another ticket. This time he gives his name as Andrew Brown, then tells Sapphire that he is going to try and convince Andy that it was him who crashed the car. Kingfish tells Andy that it was Andy who had the car all through the past week, and that he must have amnesia if he can’t remember. He warns him that he will be liable if he had any accidents, and furthermore, he convinces Andy that he borrowed $5 from Kingfish. Andy is distraught when he gets the court summons, but Amos tells him that Kingfish is pulling a fast one on him. Andy decides to go see Kingfish and beat him up, and Sapphire tells Kingfish that he needs to take his beating like a man. Amos however gets Calhoun to try and stop the fight. As Andy is about to pummel Kingfish, Calhoun runs in and stops the fight. Kingfish manages to convince Andy that he is a coward if he doesn’t punch Kingfish, so he does. Once Andy and Calhoun realize they shouldn’t be fighting, they start to make up, and while they are doing so, Kingfish sneaks out and runs away. Andy and Calhoun chase him down and both attempt to beat him up… but this time Amos stops it and forces Kingfish to admit what he did wrong. He tells the truth and tells Andy that if he can’t use his name, he’ll do 30 days in jail. Andy finally gives him permission to use his name, since as a first-time offender, he’ll only get a $2 fine. However, when he comes before the judge (Vince Townsend Jr.), he finds out that Andy has had seven violations over the past two weeks, and now faces either a $250 fine or 90 days in jail. Edgar Dearing is the motorcycle cop. 12/29/21
• 021. Quo Vadis – 11/15/1951
  • When the Kingfish attempts to withdrawal $25 from the bank, he finds out from the teller (Phil Tead) that he and Sapphire are down to their last $2.96. With bills mounting up, he takes the drastic step of turning to the Thompson Employment Agency, looking for any job no matter how tough it is… for Sapphire. When she gets a letter in the mail with the offer to work as a personal assistant, even though she doesn’t realize that Kingfish had signed her up, she jumps at the opportunity to take the job. She gives George the condition that she is going to use her maiden name and won’t tell George where she is working so he doesn’t hang around and spoil it. Furthermore, she refuses to give him any of the money. Meanwhile, he looks through his old 1922 Marietta yearbook when he was known as George “Curly” Stephens. He laments to Andy that he ruined his life, but that he still writes home to his old friends with tall tales of his great business successes. He doesn’t think it will ever catch up with him, but sure enough, one old classmate named Sam Jackson (Roy Glenn), a reporter from Marietta, looks him and wants to catch up on all of George’s successes. He invites him to a party at his apartment, where it turns out that Sapphire is actually working. When he arrives in his rented tuxedo, he spots Sapphire but manages to steer clear of her so she doesn’t see him before he finally sneaks out. When he looks Red up in the yearbook, he is reminded that Red’s nickname was “Wolf” because of all of the women he got over the years. George suddenly becomes wildly jealous and decides to spy on Sapphire as she works for Red. Even though Sapphire has left for the night, George spots him through the window dancing with a lamp as he listens to his rhumba lesson on record  and thinks it is Sapphire. He marches up to read them the riot act, but finds that Sapphire is in the lobby mailing a letter. Sapphire agrees to forgive him if he will get a job of his own. Sam excitedly phones home before leaving New York to tell his editors he’ll have a nice front-page article about George Stephens, but as he is going to grab a cup of coffee at the train station, he finds the Kingfish serving at the food counter. Ivan Browning is the employment agency associate. 5/8/22
• 022. The Diner – 11/22/1951
  • The Kingfish takes Sapphire and her Mama for a Sunday drive, and although he wants to go to Long Island, they ultimately go to where Mama wants when she takes over the driving and they head to Greenwich, Connecticut. On the way they stop at a diner, but it is so crowded inside that they can’t even eat there. Kingfish notices that there is a sign on the outside that the diner is for rent. He finds out from the proprietor that they can rent it for $500 a month. The Kingfish talks Andy into going in on the deal, but when the two try to get a loan from loan officer C. Bromley (Dick Elliot), Kingfish’s poor credit causes them to leave the bank before he can even give them his decision. Instead, Kingfish gets his half of the loan from Mama, and Andy gets his half from Amos. It turns out that the owner of the diner is thrilled to unload the place, as the highway is going to be rerouted the following week and buses will no longer go by the diner. On the first day of business, as each bus is scheduled to stop at the diner, it drives right on by. The Kingfish finds out the reason, and he sends Calhoun to try to get some action from the highway commission. Although most people there agree that some action should be taken to help Kingfish and Andy, Calhoun keeps getting re-routed from person to person, until he winds right back with the person he started with. Kingfish then decides to cash in his life insurance policy in order to pay $700 to move the diner so that it is on the new bus route. They finally get this done, but on their first day open again, no one shows up. They do, however, get a phone call from Calhoun, who tells them that he made headway with the highway commission, and they have rerouted the buses back to their old route. Douglas Evans is Mr. Jorgenson, James Flavin is Mr. Farrell, Amos Reese is Mr. Thorndyke with the highway commission. 5/9/22
• 023. The Turkey Dinner – 11/29/1951
  • The Kingfish embarrasses Sapphire while she is holding a Women’s Club meeting at their house, when they find him asleep under their coats in the bedroom. Later, Sapphire tells him that they are planning their dinner, and she has been entrusted with $150 of the club’s money to buy turkeys to serve. The Kingfish gets an idea that he can drive into the country and purchase turkeys at around half price and then sell them to the Women’s Club at a profit. He gets a coop, and then enlists Andy to front the money to make the purchase. They drive to the Green Acres Turkey Farm and make a deal with the elderly farm couple there to buy the turkeys at 35 cents per pound. After they leave, the couple congratulate themselves on the pure profit, since they didn’t own the turkey, but merely stopped at the farm for a rest on their drive. Lightnin’ sees an article in the newspaper about the robbery of twenty turkeys and the fact that the authorities obtained the license plate numbers of the perpetrators. The Kingfish assumes the cops will be closing in on them, so he quickly tricks Andy into accepting the position of President of their business, so he can absolve himself of any crime. Amos also sees the article and shares it with Andy, who then forces Kingfish to tear up their contract indicating that Andy is president. The Kingfish has Lightinin’ and Calhoun load the turkeys in the car and take them 50 miles away into New Jersey. Meanwhile, Sapphire assumes George isn’t handling the turkeys as he had promised, so she makes the purchase of twenty turkeys from Thompson’s Turkey Mart, and has them deliver them to the basement of lodge hall, right where the other turkeys had been stored. When the Kingfish and Andy start hearing the turkeys in the basement again, they think they have gone crazy. They then get rid of the second batch of turkeys, but the Kingfish later realizes that Sapphire had purchased these. In order to make up for it, he hocks most of his belongings to raise another $150 to give Sappire to replace her turkeys. Sapphire and her ladies change their minds and instead of buying turkeys, they purchase ducks from the Ye Old Mill Farm. However, they too have purchased them from the couple who merely stopped for a rest. 9/4/22
• 024. Ready-Made Family – 12/6/1951
  • Ever since he was a child, the Kingfish remembers his Uncle Clarence (Ivan Browning) giving parents a check for $500 at the christening of every baby in the family. Now as an adult, the Kingfish gets a letter from Uncle Clarence that he will be in town for business appointments and wants to stop by and see the Kingfish, and meet Sapphire and their baby. Sapphire reads the note and accuses George of having lied to his Uncle in order to get the $500 from him. The Kingfish denies it, but this is exactly what he did. With Sapphire leaving town for Chicago with her mother, the Kingfish has Andy gather up his girlfriend Carlotta Montgomery (Millie Bruce) and borrow Mrs. Thorndike’s little baby boy, then he coaches Carlotta to act like she is Sapphire and that the baby is theirs. Uncle Clarence meets them and falls for them being a loving family, even though Carlotta doesn’t know the sex of the bay or where they live. Clarence tells the Kingfish that this will fare well for him in his will. When his business appointment is cancelled, he returns to spend more time with the Kingfish and his family, but along the way, he runs into Andy and Carlotta kissing on each other in the park. The Kingfish goes to Calhoun for advice on what to do, and they come up with a plan to recover from the mess. Andy poses as Sapphire’s brother and they all meet up at the apartment for dinner. Everything seems to correct itself…until Sapphire calls and says she is back from Chicago and is at the depot, ready to head home. The Kingfish and Andy keep setting the clock forward and stealing food off of Uncle Clarence’s plate to get him out of the house. She arrives home just as everyone else is able to sneak out of the house. Sapphire is furious at the mess, and questions who was eating Pablum, but decides to let it go until the morning. Since Uncle Clarence was reading the clock that they had adjusted, he is early for his train, so he returns to the apartment again – this time finding the real Sapphire sitting on the Kingfish’s lap, causing him to storm out once again and demanding that he not try to tell him that Sapphire is his sister. Vince Townsend Jr. is the Reverend. 9/4/22
• 025. Relatives – 12/20/1951
  • The Kingfish has had a long history of not getting along with his mother-in-law. In the past, she has come to settle disputes and ends up throwing Kingfish out of the apartment, or has tried to help fix the stove, which later blew up in Kingfish’s face. This time she is back again, and this time Kingfish takes her to Domestic Relations Court, where the Judge Arthur J. Fleming (Paul Harvey) orders that Mama can no longer interfere in any way with disagreements in the household. The Kingfish holds her to the letter of his words and won’t allow her to speak to him under any circumstances at all, which Sapphire believes is carrying it to the extreme. Later, Andy advises Kingfish that psychologically speaking, keeping her quiet may cause her to blow later. Andy points out how bad Sapphire’s relatives are, including his brother-in-law, Leroy. He also asks about Kingfish’s relatives, and Kingfish admits that his only relative is his cousin Sidney, whom he hasn’t seen since he was a child. When Kingfish comes home that night, he finds out from Sapphire that Leroy is moving in from Florida in order to keep Mama company since Mama isn’t allowed to speak to Kingfish. Mama starts doing all of her talking through Leroy, including the insulting names, to Kingfish. Soon Kingfish has had enough of this, and he returns to the court, and this time the judge sentences Mama and Leroy to move out on their own. The Kingfish enjoys the peace and quiet, but soon enough it is interrupted, when his cousin Sidney (Roy Glenn), his wife, his giant Great Dane dog, and his parrot show up for a visit. When he breaks the news to Sapphire, she is nothing but cooperative since she said that it is normal that relatives occasionally show up for visits. The Kingfish soon finds that Sidney and his wife are more obnoxious and disruptive than Mama and Leroy were. Kingfish returns to the judge and asks him to lift the injunction against Mama and Leroy, as he sees this as the only way to get Sidney and his wife out of the house. However, when he returns to Leroy, he is told that he and Mama are happy in their boarding house and don’t feel welcome at Kingfish’s place. Kingfish offers him $100 to move back in, so he accepts. Amos warns Kingfish that he should be as nice to his in-laws as Sapphire was, so George begins waiting on them hand and foot. Privately, Mama, Leroy, and Sapphire laugh about the fact that they hired friends from Brooklyn to pretend to be George long-lost cousin Sidney and his wife. 12/28/22
• 026. Andy Gets a Telegram – 12/27/1951
  • When the Kingfish stays out half the night playing poker with Andy, Calhoun, and Lightnin’, Sapphire is furious and insists that Andy is a bad influence on him, and that George needs to stop seeing him. The Kingfish tells Sapphire that Andy comes from a fine family has an Uncle Percival who lives in Rio de Janeiro on a coffee plantation. This doesn’t impress Sapphire, and she insists that he break ties with Andy. The Kingfish finally builds up the courage to tell Andy the news, but before he can get it all out, he receives a call from Western Union operator (Lois Austin) with a telegram for Andy. She tells the Kingfish that Andy’s Uncle Percival is sending for Andy to come to Rio and take a job on the plantation at $250 a week. Andy holds off with saying anything to Andy about breaking off their friendship, but instead he decorates the lodge like a travel agent and offers to get Andy passage to Rio. Andy pays him $500 to make the arrangements, but when the Kingish visits a British travel agent (Lumsden Hare) and a French travel agent (Fritz Feld), he finds that they are both charging more than Andy paid him. He finally winds up booking a ticket for Andy on a cattle boat via a freighter captain (Gene Roth). Andy catches on pretty quickly, but the Kingfish manages to convince him that it will be more fun with the cows. As the Kingfish chats with Calhoun about Andy’s opportunity, the Kingfish decides that he really needs to get in on it since raking in $250 will create an easy lifestyle. He concocts a fake letter from ‘Nearsighted Thompson’, the doctor who delivered both of them, and then supposedly got them mixed up. The Kingfish convinces Andy that he was actually born ‘George Stevens’, while the Kingfish should have been born ‘Andrew Brown’. In order not to prevent the new ‘Andy’ from missing out on his birthright, the old ‘Andy’ allows the new ‘Andy’ to go to Rio in his place. Amos then sees Andy moping around town when he’s supposed to be on his way to Rio, and he clues him in on the fact that the Kingfish once again bamboozled him. Sapphire comes to see her husband, and Andy and Amos tell her that the Kingfish is on his way to Rio after having swindled Andy. She is beside herself with this information, mainly because she was the one who faked the letter from Uncle Percival in order to get Andy out of her husband’s life. The Kingfish happily sails to Rio amongst the cattle. Syd Saylor is the passport photographer. 12/28/22
• 027. Hospitalization – 1/3/1952
  • Sapphire sets up the Kingfish with a job interview at an insurance company, where the Kingfish talks to the sales manager Charles Hanson (Stanley Andrews) and tells him that instead of just taking the ten percent commision they are offering, he is going to start his own insurance company. His plans is to sell insurance to healthy people who will never use it and keep 100% of it for himself. He names his company the Multi-Million Dollar Insurance Company and then goes to work on Andy. He pretends he is busily writing out insurance payments for minor ailments, but Andy still has no interest in buying it, and when Lightnin’ interrupts their conversation to get his broom from the office, Andy suddenly disappears. Later, when Andy shows up at the lodge, the Kingfish pulls him in and asks him if he can test his new x-ray camera on him. Andy agrees, and the Kingfish snaps a photo of him with an old box camera, then supposedly develops it in a matter of seconds. He shows Andy an old test x-ray of his own that a friend took for practice. Andy notices a belt buckle in the x-ray with the initials G.S. on it, but George “Kingfish” Stevens tells him that it is part of his anatomy and that the G.S. stands for gall stones. Andy becomes worried about this illness and pleads with Kingfish to put him on the insurance policy. The Kingfish collects $50 from him and sends him on his way. Andy visits with Dr. Joseph Wilkin (Bill Walker), who can find nothing wrong with him but wants to examine the x-ray closer. Andy wants to go into the hospital so there is someone to take care of him, and since he seems so full of anxiety, Wilkin agrees to the hospital stay. Kingfish realizes that he will have to pay for the stay, and this is validated by Calhoun, who says Andy could sue him if he doesn’t pay. Calhoun suggests that since the Kingfish had scared him into the hospital that he might be able to scare him out. The Kingfish then tells Andy that Dr. Wilkin had his surgical training in the Chicago Slaughterhouse. Calhoun then comes into the room and adds to Andy’s fears by telling him that he is assisting Dr. Wilkin, and the proceeds to uncover a tray of large metal cutlery, including a saw and a machete. Andy hightails it out of the hospital, leaving the Kingfish in the room. Dr. Wilkin tells the Kingfish that he had only wanted to tell Andy that the x-rays turned out not be his, but that he was anxious to find the person in the photo, as the x-ray shows gall stones that need to come out immediately, nearly causing the Kingfish to faint. 6/16/23

SEASON 2

• 028. The Piggy Bank – 7/10/1952
  • The Kingfish is worried sick about his upcoming 25th wedding anniversary because when he and Sapphire went on their honeymoon to Niagara Falls, he promised that they would come back on their 25th anniversary. Just three years ago, Sapphire decided to help along their savings by purchasing a piggy bank and starting filling it for the next three years so they would have enough money to go on the trip when the time ran around. Although he refrained from breaking the bank open, he quickly figured out that he could take out a little bit at a time over the next few years until he had virtually spent the $300 that they had added to the bank. To make up for the lack of weight, he would put lead washers inside every time he made a withdraw. As the anniversary is just a few days away now, he won’t let Sapphire or her mother open it until the day of the anniversary. The only thing the Kingfish can think to do is to take the ladies out to the movies and then have Andy rob their place while they are gone. Andy stays a little too long eating their food, so when he hears them returning, he has to scramble out the door. After the Kingfish and the ladies get inside, a police oficer comes to the door an returns the piggy bank that the thief who got away had dropped. The Kingfish has to try some of his money-making ideas. First, he tries to buy $300 worth of cereal that will double his money if he doesn’t ike it. When the storeowner realizes what he is up to, he takes off the offer and knocks down the cereal display. Next, Kingfish and Andy claim to be foreign tycoons trying to borrow money at the bank, but they are declines. Lastly, George goes on a game show called The Lucky Break, where he gets a chance to answer a trivia question. The answer to the question is named John Alden. The Kingfish an’t get it and says he’s “All Done” This is good enough for the TV host, and the Kingfish wins the money. Back home, Sappire needs another quarter to pay the milkman, so Sapphire tries to get the money from the bank, only to find washers coming out of the bank. Sapphire is furious, so she and her mother wait for George to get home. However, when he breaks the piggy bank, she finds the entire $300 inside. As they enjoy their return to Niagara Falls, Kingfish promises to come back to the Falls for their 50th anniversary. 10/16/23
• 029. Sapphire’s Mysterious Admirer – 7/24/1952
  • Sapphire’s teenaged neighbor Marilyn Jackson (Patricia Washington) comes over to see her in a panic because her father (Arthur McNeeley) has forbidden her to see her teen boyfriend Richard (Marcus Gordon). She has been writing about Richard in her diary and plans to marry him after high school. She asks that Sapphire keep her diary at her house, and that she be permitted to come over and write in it. Later, the Kingfish brings Andy home because he has an upset stomach, and while getting him some medicine from the closet, he finds the diary. He is suspicious, but since it is written in shorthand, he has to take it to a professional stenographer to interpret it. Sure enough, it talks of “Sapphire’s” love for a man named Richard. Kingfish keeps reading the diary every day for updates and finds out that Richard is going to call from the drugstore so that she can tell him of her final decision concerning their relationship. Andy tells Amos about what is going on, and even he understands the reason for concern in this situation. Kingfish and Andy stake out the drugstore to see who Richard is, but they do not even suspect him at first when they see him, considering how young he is. However, after listening to his conversation with “Sapphire”, the Kingfish is convinced that she is in love – and plans to marry – a much younger man. Meanwhile, Marilyn calls her father and tells him that he doesn’t need to worry about her keeping company with Richard since they are now going to be married. Mr. Jackson then rushes over to the school, where Richard is being tutored by his track coach (Roy Glenn) and demands to see him. Likewise, Kingfish rushes to the school and also demands to see him. Sapphire has read about their plans to be married, and she too heads to the school to try and talk Richard out of it. The trainer is flabbergasted that Richard appears to be having multiple affairs, but nonetheless protects him by pulling him up on the wood rings via the pulley in order to keep him out of harm’s reach. Everyone explains what they are doing there, but Kingfish blows off the question, so Sapphire doesn’t realize that he suspected her. Kingfish later describes the incident with his friends, and questions why he would ever suspect Sapphire. Amos suggests that the idea isn’t too far-fetched that a woman would be attracted to a younger man, especially since Kingfish has let himself go. That night he comes home dressed like a teenager offering to play tennis with Sapphire. 10/18/23 (online)
• 030. The Eyeglasses – 8/7/1952
  • Andy is caught running through a red light while sleeping, so he faces a judge (Vince Townsend, Jr.), who also notes that he is driving with an expired license. Andy says this is because he failed his driver’s permit renewal because he failed the eye test. The judge tells him that he cannot drive again until he sees an eye doctor and gets some glasses. Meanwhile, when Kingfish shares this information with Sapphire and her mother, they berate him because he’s never even bought a car for them, meaning that they’ve never taken any sort of vacation. They each vow to give him $100 toward a car if he can go out and find one. He meets with a car dealer named Mr. Cochran, but with that amount of money, he only offers the Kingfish and old jalopy with over 300,000 miles that rattles and starts to fall apart when it is started. The Kingfish looks to Calhoun for advice on how to get Andy’s car from him, and Calhoun recommends finding an eye doctor who will tell Andy that he’s not saft to be behind the wheel of a car. The next time that the Kingfish sees Andy, he acts as if he has amazing vision, impressing Andy by seeing the theater sign blocks away and telling him that he can see ants on the trees and what they are carrying in their mouths. He tells Andy that he’s been taking correspondence courses in optometry, so Andy asks him if he will give him his eye exam. The Kingfish has Lightnin’ help him set up the office like an optometrist, and then he has Andy is as a patient. After convincing Andy that he can’t see when he covers his eyes, and that his eyeballs are in the wrong sockets, he tells Andy that he shouldn’t be driving at all. However, when Andy says he wants to get a second opinion, the Kingfish gives him a pair of extra-thick glasses and tells him that he must wear them during his driving exam. When Andy tries to wear them during the exam, the examiner tears up his application before Andy drives because Andy climbs into the back seat of his own car, looking for the steering wheel. Andy is finally convinced to sell the car to Kingfish for $200, but when he arrives at the Kingfish’s apartment to give him the title, he seems to have cold feet about the sale. After being hounded by the Kingfish, Sapphire, and her mother, all of whom are ready to leave on their vacation to New Orleans, Andy finally agrees and sells the car. Then Andy reveals that he had tries again to drive his car while wearing the glasses, and as everyone can see, the car is completely destroyed due to a crash. Corny Anderson is the bailiff. 2/11/24
• 031. The Broken Clock – 8/21/1952
  • The Mystic Knights of the Sea lodge holds a testimonial dinner for Kingfish to celebrate his twenty years of leading the club, and they present him with a new electric clock. When he gets home, he shows off the clock to the unimpressed Sapphire and Mama, but when he plugs it in, the clock doesn’t work. Andy tries to help him fix it, but winds up leaving several of the parts out of it. They look at the box and find out that the clock has a lifetime warranty, so they begin making phone calls. After receiving the run-around, they are told to go visit the clock manufacturer, the Compo Manufacturing Company. Unbeknownst to them, the commercial building has recently been transformed into a secret military complex. The Compo manager Mr. Cartwright (Harry Shannon) is still working for them and has designed a altimeter to be used with missiles in low-temperature conditions. However, the initial prototype has failed so they have sent for two mechanics from their Jersey plant to test out a new one. When the Kingfish and Andy arrive, they are surprised by the armed military sentry (Roy Glenn), but when they mention being there for a clock, the guard thinks they are the mechanics and sends them in to see Mr. Cartwright. They are surprised when Cartwright tells them to remove their clothes, and then gives them giant parkas to wear to go test the new clock. They are put inside a deep freezer where it is sixty degrees below zero along with the new clock. After a while, they get too cold and miserable and decide to leave, taking the altimeter with them. Cartwright reports the missing clock and the government sends two G-Men to investigate the act of espionage. They trace the original clock by its serial number back to George “Kingfish” Stevens and go to see him. They guys have already seen the altimeter and determined that its one hand is indicating that it is ten minutes of 700 feet. In frustration, Kingfish throws the clock in the ash can, where it is retrieved by Lightnin’, who thinks it is a speedometer. The G-Men arrest the Kingfish, who laments what Sapphire and “Old Ironsides” will say about it. The G-Men think these names belong to additional spies, so they arrest them as well and take everyone to jail. Amos asks Lightnin’ to drive him to the jailhouse to see them, and he finds the altimeter in his car. Realzing that this is why they had been arrested, he takes the altimeter to the station and explains everything. They let everyone go, and Mr. Cartwright presents the Kingfish with a new clock to make up for the trouble. When the Kingfish plugs in the new clock, it doesn’t work either, so he smashes it in frustration. Mama then opens a letter from the electric company explaining that they’ve turned off the apartment’s power since the Kingfish hasn’t paid the electric bill.  2/11/24
• 032. The Boarder – 9/4/1952
  • When Mama goes off to Chicago to visit her other daughter x, the Kingfish realizes that he will now be short the $15 week that she had been contributing to the price of the rent. Sapphire suggests that they rent out the spare room to a boarder, and Kingfish finally agrees when she tells him that the only other alternative is for him to get a job. He immediately recruits Andy to be the boarder, telling him that he will receive the love and affection that he currently lacks while living alone, as long as he pays the $15 a week. When they get back to the apartment, Sapphire tells him that she has already found a boarder named Chester B. “Breezy” Benson (Roy Glenn). The Kingfish initially pretends he has no idea why Andy is there and that their entire conversation never happened, but eventually tells him the truth. The Kingfish takes an immediate dislike to Benson, as he is loud, obnoxious, and sings Red Sails in the Sunset and The Toreador Song at the top of his lungs continuously. It drives the Kingfish crazy, annoys the neighbors, including Leadpipe Sam who bangs on the radiator pipes as a protest, and even causes the neighborhood dog to howl. The Kingfish thinks he has some relief when Benson’s friend Wright (Dudley Dickerson) stops by to visit him, but soon they both end up singing. The Kingfish goes to Calhoun to see what recourse he might have to throw Benson out, but since Sapphire already signed a one-year lease, Calhoun has to come up with another idea. The Kingfish tells Benson that there is no clause in the contract stating that they cannot take in other borders to share the roof with him, so he brings in Andy, Cam Madsen, and Calhoun and his trained seal to move in. Nelson is beside himself and raises emphatic objections, especially when all four men and the seal are forced to share the same bed. The next day, Andy tells Amos about how it only took ten minutes before the seal mistook Benson’s toe for a fish, causing him to immediately evacuate. The Kingfish immediately sends for his mother-in-law to return. The next day, he runs into Benson leaving his apartment, and Benson tells him that he will be seeing him weekly. Sapphire had been so impressed with his singing that she hired him to give music lessons to her and Mama. The Kingfish enters the apartment only to find Sapphire and Mama struggling to sing The Toreador Song. 7/6/24
• 033. The Engagement Ring – 9/18/1952
  • After the Kingfish is hounded by another bill collector (James Adamson), a hefty woman named Juliet Williams (Zelda Cleaver) walks into the office and gives the Kingfish ten dollars. He realizes that she has come to the wrong address but is anxious to receive the other $90 that she promises him. He prods her for information until he realizes she thinks he is a matrimonial agent. The Kingfish gets a photo from her and shows it to Andy and explains that even though she is plump she would make a great wife because he wouldn’t have to work so hard to fatten her up since she is ‘pre-blubbered’. Andy agrees to meet her, and although he is unimpressed with her figure as well as her cooking, he is quite impressed by her expensive bracelet, leading him to believe that she is rich. He continues to see her and eventually begins to fall in love with her for real. When the Kingfish attempts to collect his additional $90, she tells him that one of her neighbor suitors has suddenly become attentive and has proposed to her. Kingfish tells her not to do anything hasty as he is certain that Andy is intending to propose as well. Since Andy cannot afford an engagement ring, Kingfish makes a plan to steal the one off of Sapphire’s finger while she is sleeping and let Andy use that. Since it is sure to be too small, he thinks he can then offer to have it re-sized, and by that time, he will be able to tap into her fortune and buy her another one. That night while Andy waits in the cold and Sapphire and her Mama play Canasta, the Kingfish tries to get them to go to bed early by bringing them three rounds of warm milk. Andy has to postpone his date until after midnight, as the Kingfish falls asleep before the women. However, he eventually gets the ring off and gives it to Andy. When he gives it to Juliet, they are both surprised that it fits so well, and she sees this a sign and accepts the proposal. Sapphire thinks she has lost her ring, and the Kingfish assures her it must be somewhere in their apartment. Sapphire finds out from Amos about Andy’s impending nuptials, so she invites Andy and Juliet to dinner. Both Andy and the Kingfish go to every length possible to keep Sapphire from seeing her ring including hiding her hand in Andy’s jacket, turning off the lights, and trying to blindfold Sapphire before she sees the ring. Andy finally tries to take it off to show it to her but drops in on the floor. Everyone looks for it, and it is Sapphire who eventually finds it, but then recognizes it as her own ring. The ladies bicker about whose it is until Mama makes it clear that Andy gave Juliet Sapphire’s ring. The Kingfish is thrown out of the apartment, and while Andy is waiting outside until they let him back in, Mama pours two pitchers of warm milk over their heads. 7/6/24
• 034. Arabia – 10/2/1952
  • 10/31/24
• 035. Kingfish Sells a Lot -= 10/16/1952
  • Amos narrates the tale of how Kingfish has twenty years earlier purchased a vacant lot in New Jersey in hopes of New York City spreading as far as his land, which would make his investment fruitful. Sapphire is now bringing this up again and wants the Kingfish to sell off the land and get his money back. The only time that the land had proved to be worth anything is when a movie studio paid him $50 to put a mansion facade on it to film there. Kingfish discusses this predicament with Calhoun, who thinks that the house looks real. He points out that the only person who might want this land in the country is someone who has problems with their nerves by living in the city. The Kingfish thinks that Andy might be a likely target, so he visits him first thing in the morning before Andy has gotten out of bed. He tells Andy that he was shaking in his sleep, and then once Andy wakes up, the Kingfish shakes him several times and tells him that this is caused by Andy’s nerves. He tells him that he needs to move to the country, and then shows him the picture of the ‘mansion’ on his lot, offering to sell it to him for $1000. Andy wants to see the house in person, so Kingfish borrows Lightnin’s car and takes him out to see it. He tells him that there isn’t time to go inside because he has to go meet another interested buyer. Andy agrees then and there to buy the house and signs a contract for it. Andy later returns with Lightin to unload some of his furniture in the house. When the two of them carry chairs into the house, they quickly realize that they’ve gone through the house and into the backyard. Eventually they realize that the house is no more than a facade and that the Kingfish has bamboozled him again. Andy first threatens to beat up the Kingfish and then settles on suing him. Calhoun tells the Kingfish that Andy will probably win this case, so he comes up with another idea to make Andy want to keep the lot. He shows up at the lot to meet Andy and tells him that he’s decided to give him his money back. However, he and Calhoun have rigged a system of putting motor oil in the ground which Calhoun can cause to shoot up using a bicycle pump. As the Kingfish is offering to give him his money back, he sees the oil spring up and decides to keep the lot after all. Later, a man named Mr. Brokaw (Vince Townsend Jr.) visits the Kingfish and tells him that they are developing a tract of homes on his property and offers him $2000 for it. The Kingfish immediately calls Andy and asks him to come meet him, and then he tells him that he had swindled him out of money for the lot by producing oil in the fashion that he did. He says his conscience has been bother him and wants to give him his money back again. Andy accepts the money back and signs the property back over to Kingfish, who then confesses the truth about the lot being worth $2000. Andy then admits that he shouldn’t wait for a visit from Mr. Brokaw, because it was Andy who sent him over in the first place. 11/3/24
• 040. The Christmas Story – 12/25/1952
  • Nine years earlier, Amos waits in the hospital for the birth of his first child. He calls Andy to let him know that the baby should be coming soon. Andy is so excited he nearly rushes there in his robe. Once he arrives, he and Amos bump into each other as they pace in the waiting room. Andy is sure that the baby will be a boy, but the baby is born, the nurse introduces them to Amos’s daughter Arbadella. Andy gives her a box of crayons to celebrate her birth. Back in the present nine years later, it is Christmas Eve and Andy is lamenting the fact that he can barely afford any gifts. He takes Arbadella (Patty Marie Ellis) window shopping and finds out that what she really wants is a new talking doll. As he and Lightnin’ are wrapping presents, he again laments that he can still only afford to get her a box of crayons. The Kingfish stops by to drop a hint that he wants a bathrobe for Christmas and then tells Andy that he’s not sure if his gift for Andy will quite fit through the door. When Andy tells him that he can’t afford to buy anything for him, suddenly the Kingfish tells him that he might not get around to delivering his gift until February. Andy decides to look for a job at the Globe Department Store and meets with the hiring manager Mr. Simmons (Napoleon Simpson). He tells him that there isn’t any work this late in the game… except for a job playing Santa Claus for the kids. Simmons tells him that if he runs into any trouble to just call the floorwalker. One boy name Oliver Smith (Baxter Roseburr) refuses to promise to drink his milk, and one named Percy Carter (Alvin James) asks him too many questions he can’t answer, so in both cases he calls over to the floorwalker. One girl named Henrietta Lewis (Suzanne Webb) gives Andy a list of the gifts she wants but they seem to be all for boys. She tells him that her little brother is sick and she’s just asking on his behalf. One last little boy (Freddie Moultrie) shows up as they are closing down and gives Andy a long wish list, including a baby sister… so Andy calls the floorwalker again. At the end of the day, Mr. Simmons pays Andy with the doll that Arbadella wanted. He takes it over to Amos’s house and drops it off, along with gifts for Amos, his wife Ruby (Jane Adams), his son Amos Jr., and daugher Amosandra. He tells Amos to tell Arbadella that her gift is from Santa Claus. After Andy leaves, Amos tells Ruby that Andy is as close to the real Santa as anyone ever was. He goes in to say goodnight to Arbadella, who tells Amos that she hopes it snows the next day for Christmas. She asks him to turn on some Christmas music, but Amos tells her that the musical rendition of The Lord’s Prayer is as much of a Christmas song as any ever was. When she asks him what The Lord’s Prayer is all about, Amos breaks it all down for her. Amos then says goodnight as Arbadella starts to full asleep… and the snow starts to fall outside. 6/16/23

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