The Terrible Catsafterme

Brad's Musings and Meanderings

random acts of quoting

"Whoops! I just took the square root of it." - Harely Estin, "Newhart"

SEASON 1 – NBC

Created by Dick St. Clair and Jenna McMahon

The series is a spin-off of sitcom “Diff’rent Strokes”

Theme song: “The Facts of Life” written by Al Burton, Gloria Loring, and Alan Thicke. Performed by Charlotte Rae and cast (Episodes 1-6), and then by the cast minus Rae. 

  • 001. Rough Housing – 8/24/1979
    • Housekeeper Edna Garrett (Charlotte Rae) has temporarily left her job working for Phil Drummond (Conrad Bain) and his daughter Kimberly (Dana Plato) and adopted sons Willis (Todd Bridges) and Arnold Jackson (Gary Coleman) to assist at Kimberly’s private school Eastland in Peekskill, New York. As Mrs. Garrett and the girls prepare for the upcoming Harvest Ball, Mr. Drummond and the kids come to attend the ball and to ask Mrs. Garrett to return home. She promises that she will eventually. The school’s new headmaster Stephen Bradley (John Lawlor) hopes to loosen some of the long standing rules of the school, namely the curfew on the night of the ball, but one of the long-standing teachers Miss Emily Mahoney (Jenny O’Hara) objects to him. The core group of students who Mrs. Garrett is caring for include the affluent and somewhat snooty Blair Warner (Lisa Whelchel), tomboy Cindy Webster (Julie Anne Haddock), the young roller skate-wearing Dorothy “Tootie” Ramsey (Kim Fields), the portly and jovial Natalie Green (Mindy Cohn), Sue Ann Weaver (Julie Piekarski), and Nancy Olson (Felice Schachter). When Mr. Bradley inquires about who will be running for the Harvest Queen, Blair thinks her standing as winner for two-years running makes her a shoe-in, but Sue Ann also nominates Cindy. She lacks the confidence but the other girls convince her to give it a go and she finally agrees, hugging Sue Ann and telling her that she loves her for nominating her. Blair makes snide comments about her tomboyishness and goes further by insinuating that Cindy only likes girls. This gives her a crisis of confidence and she announces she is dropping out of the contest. Mrs. Garrett talks with her and convinces that everyone is different in the speed in which they bloom or take an interest in boys. Mrs. Garrett then confronts Blair and insinuates to her that she knows Blair has been with a lot of men. Blair claims to only be a tease and adamantly insists that Mrs. Garrett is unfairly judging her. Mrs. Garrett points out that this is exactly how she treated Cindy. Blair realizes her mistake and apologizes to Cindy and encourages her to run against her. Blair ends up winning, and wins over her crush Greg Hockney, but Cindy confesses that her clock began its romantic ticking when Greg saw her in the dress that Mrs. Garrett helped make for her and gave her a wink, much to Blair’s irritation. The Drummond family helps celebrate both girls’ victories. 7/25/20

  • 002. Like Mother, Like Daughter – 8/31/1979
    • The Eastland girls are getting ready for parents night and have decorated in a French theme for the occasion. Blair is particularly excited to see her mother Monica (Pat Huntington), and when she shows up early, all of the girls are enthralled by her beauty… and Mr. Bradley is equally enamored and thinks about asking her out. Before he gets the chance, Justin Branch (Donald May), the father of fellow student Nina, shows up. He and Monica had known each other when he attended the boys’ school up the street from Peekskill where Monica formerly attended. While they are reminiscing, Miss Mahoney spots them kissing in the garden. Natalie and Tootie also see them and begin spreading the rumors. Soon Blair overhears them planning a romantic dinner, and becomes furious since she knows Mr. Branch is married. She begins giving away the clothes that her mother gave her, and then tells her to her face that she is ashamed that she is her mother, earning her a slap across the face from her mother. Mrs. Garrett speaks to Blair and tells her that she is doing a lot of judging, and that when one loves someone, we should do it unconditionally even if there are things one doesn’t like about about them. Blair is also adamant that she doesn’t want to grow up and be a heartbreaker with multiple husbands like her mother, but Mrs. Garrett tells her that although the leaf doesn’t fall far from the tree, the wind can always take them to other places to grow their own tree. She goes to apologize to her mother, and finds her doing some cooking with the other girls. Monica confesses that maybe she should start trying to be more like her daughter than the other way around. The girls and parents all gather around and sing a French tune. 7/25/20
  • 003. The Return of Mr. Garrett – 9/7/1979
    • Shortly after a stern warning form Mr. Bradley that the girls need to buckled down for their exams and they immediately start playing with their Ouija board, they receive it a visit from Robert Garrett (Robert Alda), Mrs. Garrett’s husband from fifteen years prior. She is initially irritated about the fact that he dropped in unannounced, thinking that he needs money for his gambling debts, but he announces that he has quit gambling and is working at a hotel in Atlantic City. Furthermore he asks for her to re-marry him. He sweeps her off her feet, and she begins to fall for him again. Blair thinks she should run for the hills, while Sue Ann thinks there is true love between them. Robert strikes up a friendship with Tootie and teaches her how to play poker. She and the other girls begin taking money from their school accounts, and soon Mr. Bradley and an outraged Miss Mahoney find out why. Mrs. Garrett is livid when she finds out, and even more so when she finds out that he plans to return to St. Louis for a big poker game. She realizes that Robert doesn’t want a wife as much as he wants a guardian, so she declines his marriage offer and sends him on his way. Blair suggests that they might find out who her future husband will be by using the Ouija Board again. 8/23/20
  • 004. I.Q. – 9/14/1979
    • The girls are studying hard for their exams and Mrs. Garrett is attending flying lessons to overcome her fear of flying. Mr. Bradley disrupts everything when he requests the I.Q. scores of the girls from their elementary school years. Tootie finds the scores and shares them with the rest of the girls. It turns out that Sue Ann, who has the reputation for being the smartest girl in school. has the lowest score. Nancy’s score is the highest, and suddenly everyone starts turning to her for help. The stress upsets her and causes her to fail her next exam. Likewise Sue Ann is devastated by her I.Q. score, and she fails her exam as well. Mrs. Garrett is annoyed with the importance that Mr. Bradley put on these scores, and requests that they take an I.Q. test to see which of them is the smarter one. He accepts the challenge, but soon buckles under the pressure himself. On this ground, Mrs. Garrett requests that the girls be allowed to re-take their exams considering the pressure that was upon them. She also helps convince the girls that the I.Q. scores do not reflect their potential to do well in school. Nancy then requests that Sue Ann help her study once again. Tootie finishes writing sentences for being nosy and passing them around the school, and Mrs. Garrett heads out for her first flight. 8/23/20
  • 005. Overachieving – 3/12/1980
    • The girls prepare for Career Day at Eastland, as Mrs. Garrett helps them from everything from beauty tips for Tootie to tuning Molly’s guitar. Tootie’s father Mr. Ramsey (Robert Hooks), a government lawyer, arrives early and quickly notices that Tootie’s goals do not seem aligned with his. She talks more about becoming a beautician than a career that he thinks suits her. He determines that this is coming from her tutelage under Mrs. Garrett, so he asks Mr. Bradley to not let her associate with Tootie. When Mr. Bradley questions Tootie about her career, she tells him that she plans to skip college in lieu of opening a beauty salon with Natalie called Toot’s and Nat’s. Mr. Bradley then tells Mrs. Garrett how Mr. Ramsey feels. She is clearly upset and confieds in Blair and Sue Ann about the topic, and is overheard by Mr. Ramsey. He apologizes to Mrs. Garrett for blaming her, realizing now that she is only a symptom and the school isn’t challenging enough for Tootie. He tells her that he will be withdrawing her from Eastland. After his presentation to the girls for Career Day, the girls attempt to make a fact-based case about why Tootie should stay. Mr. Bradley even gets involved by extolling the merits of the school. Bradley is unconvinced, but after Mrs. Garrett and Tootie talk to him one more time, and remind him that he once had wild dreams of being a cowboy called Buffalo Ramsey, he finally relents and lets her stay. 12/7/20
  • 006. Emily Dickinson – 3/14/1980
    • Blair’s been spending a lot of time rehearsing for the play Romeo and Juliet, especially the kissing scenes with her boyfriend Jason (Duane LaDage). Mr. Bradley has made it clear that all of the girls better have their poetry assignments on his desk on time, but with all her rehearsing, Blair has neglected to start her poem. She looks to inspiration from Emily Dickinson, and then gets the idea to simply plagiarize one of her poems. Tootie is there when it happens, and blackmails Blair into doing her chores for her. Mr. Bradley gives Blair an A+, and then uses her paper to grade on a curve, so the rest of the girls get C’s or worse, and are told to do their poems over again. What’s more, he submits the poem to the New York State Poetry Festival. Blair can’t stand the guilt and confies in Mrs. Garrett, who convinces Blair she needs to tell Mr. Bradley. She tries, but he is so pleased with her, he rushes her out to go on her date. Blair can’t feign interest in Jason because of the guilty, so she cuts the date short and writes another poem. Then just after Mr. Bradley notifies everyone that Blair took third in the contest, she tells hi the truth. Mrs. Garrett reads her poem aloud, and it is riddled with guilt… and also longing for the Blair with all of the flattering features. Mr. Bradley punishes her by having her withdraw from the play, grounding her for a month, and failing her in English. Although disappointed, she takes the punishment… and even agrees to give Tootie another half-day of work. 12/8/20
  • 007. Dieting – 3/21/1980
    • Many of the Eastland girls are considering going on a diet, as Nancy is having trouble buttoning her pants and wants to keep slim for her boyfriend Roger, and Blair has set up Nancy to go to a party with a rich boy named Scott Dunbar III, but advises her that she should drop a few pounds to make sure he likes her. Even Mrs. Garrett has bought a size 14 dress, and decides to return it until she can get into a size 12. Some of the other girls decide to forego diets, as Molly won’t let society dictate how she is supposed to look, and Natalie thinks it is futile. Mr. Bradley however is not happy about so much of the food being returned to the cooks, and is irritated that Mrs. Garrett is participating in the diets. Nancy seems to be struggling the most, and hasn’t much of anything for nearly a week, which causes her to faint. Even after she is checked out by a doctor, she refuses to eat, so Mrs. Garrett makes her favorite rice pudding, and Mr. Bradley brings Chinese food over and demands that she eat. Natalie’s feelings are hurt when a grocery delivery boy named Steve (Greg Bradford) assumes that some of the diet food that they ordered is for her, but he later returns and apologizes and brings her a book about the Three Stooges. Mrs. Garrett decides to go ahead and wear the size 14 dress, and work on gradually losing weight instead of rushing to do so. She finally encourages Nancy to not be concerned, and if she must diet, to do it wisely. Blair feels guilty about her comments that Nancy should lose weight for her date, and gets her to eat the rice pudding. For revenge, Nancy good-naturedly shoves Blair’s face in it. 4/1/21
  • 008. The Facts of Love (aka Sex Education) – 4/4/1980
    • Molly announces that she’s entered puberty just at the time the Mrs. Garrett announces that she’s going to be hosting a sex education class. Meanwhile, despite the fact that Natalie and the other girls have a crush on delivery boy Steve, Blair is becoming romantically linked with him and plans a date parking on ‘Makeout Mountain’ with him in his brother’s van. Mrs. Garrett catches them kissing and wonders why she won’t tell anyone she is dating him, but Blair says it is because she doesn’t want to hurt Natalie. Privately she tells Sue Ann that she is planning to sexually experiment with Roger. Mr. Bradley doesn’t agree with teaching the sex education curriculum and insists on sitting in on the class. However the questions get embarrassing for him and he bows out. Mrs. Garrett tells the girls that a bigger part to their sexuality is about self-esteem and how high the stakes are when they gamble with sex early in life. Tootie finds out that Blair is ‘stealing’ Natalie’s crush and becomes angry with her. On the date, Steve is actually the one who wants to take it slow, while Blair wants to barrel forward with the physicality. Steve gets offended when Blair just wants to mess around and doesn’t want to formally go steady with him, and his anger causes him to push her down and get aggressive. Later Mr. Bradley and Mrs. Garrett find out that Blair is with the police, but she comes home before they can leave to look for her. She says that Steve was picked up when he angrily sped out of the parking lot. She also admits that Mrs. Garrett was right about self-esteem and that she has a lot to learn. Natalie also tells everyone that she knew about Blair and Steve, but that she forgives her. 4/1/21
  • 009. Flash Flood – 4/11/1980
    • One stormy night, the girls get world that there are flash flood warnings in the area. Blair is concerned about her horse Chestnut, and Tootie worries about her rabbits Romeo and Juliet. Mr. Bradley orders both girls not go there, because if the dam breaks, they could under eight feet of water. The girls go anyway to try and rescue the animals, but then see that the bridge has washed out. Bradley shows up and rescues them all, but in the process, Blair becomes attracted to Bradley for taking charge of the situation, and begins calling him Steven. On the way back, he breaks his ankle crossing the creek, and Blair tries to wait on him, asking if she can massage his knee. Tootie gets hold of the National Guard, and Bradley demands that they all evacuate instead of trying to save the school building. He also tells Blair that she’s not really in love with him, but has hero worship, since she was so confused and helpless while stuck in the stables. This angers her, and she tell shim that they could have saved themselves, and she doesn’t know what she ever saw in him. The National Guard soldier (Vincent Bufano) shows up, but they all refuse to leave when they hear that some of the males students are staying in their dorms and saving their buildings. The soldier carries out Mr. Bradley, while the girls begin digging trenches, filling sandbags, and scooping water form the basement. Mrs. Garrett sends Blair to grab a plunger, but she doesn’t know what a plunger is. 7/28/21
  • 010. Adoption – 4/25/20
    • Mr. Bradley has the girls working on a project to explore their roots by doing a family tree. Blair is telling her store through fashions of her ancestors, and is having her father’s factory sending vintage clothes. Natalie doesn’t have her project and claims that she lost it. When everyone notices the differences in her parents’ hair and eye color, Natalie gets upset and admits to everyone that she is adopted. The girls all assure her that they still feel the same way about her. Blair decides to uses her mother’s boyfriend Judge Garfield to help her find her real mother’s name. The girls have differing opinions on whether Blair should be interfering. Mrs. Garrett tries to put a stop to it, but Natalie assures her that she wants Blair’s help. Mr. Bradley doesn’t think it is a good idea, and he orders Blair not to take the call from the judge when he returns Blair’s call with her real parents information, but Mrs. Garrett thinks it should be up to Natalie and her parents. Natalie says she feel incomplete not knowing, but Mrs. Garrett assures them that all young girls feel incomplete and confused… and the girls – and Mr. Bradley – all concur. She also tells her how much her adoptive parents love her and that she might be better suited to wait until she is ready to find her birth parents. When the phone rings, Natalie decides not to answer it. 7/29/21
  • 011. Running – 5/2/1980
    • Mr. Bradley is excited that the track championship is coming up, and he is again relying on Sue Ann to win for the third time, which will allow them to permanently keep the trophy. Sue Ann has other dies, and wants to skip the race this year because she can’t manage the time along with her studies. Instead, she has agreed to coach Cindy so that she can take her place. Tootie is working on a photography assignment, and Mrs. Garrett uses her camera to take a picture of Sue Ann and Cindy to commemorate their working together. Mr. Bradley tries to convince Sue Ann to race, but finally accepts that it will be Cindy this year. During a run of all the girls, along with Mrs. Garrett and Mr. Bradley, he tells them that Cindy has actually beaten Sue Ann’s record. The girls give Cindy so much credit that Sue Ann starts to feel forgotten, and decides to get back in the race. This causes a rift between them, and Mr. Bradley admits to Mrs. Garrett that he purposely lied about the record in order to push them both to enter. Gradually the rift gets more and more serious to the point that they get into a fist fight, and Blair is given a black eye in the process. Mrs. Garrett really comes down on Mr. Bradley, and then shows the girls the picture that she took of them. Neither one wants it, so she tears it in half and gives each piece to the opposite girl. They then realize that their friendship is too strong to break up over a race. Mr. Bradley to confesses to the girls that he lied about the record. They girls ask each other if they can keep the other girl’s picture to remind them of how dumb they’ve been. Mr. Bradley offers to take a new picture of the two of them with Mrs. Garrett being the third champion among them. 1/22/22
  • 012. Molly’s Holiday – 6/4/1980
    • The girls are all getting ready to go on holiday, either going back home for two weeks, or going with Mrs. Garrett to New York City. Molly, however, finds out that her recently separated father is coming to get her. She is completely uncooperative and refuses to even speak to him. Mrs. Garrett tries to get Mr. Bradley to speak to Molly, but he is in too much of a rush to head off to Hawaii. Mrs. Garrett and the girls try to comfort her, with Blair telling her all of the advantages of being the child of divorced parents…and the guilty presents that come along with it. Natalie tells her that her parents got divorced and then got back together when Natalie came down with mono. Molly uses that idea, and calls her mother and tells her that she has mono to get her to come and hopefully reconcile with her father. However, when her father Jeff (William Bogert) shows up to get her, he is not alone and has brought his new girlfriend Angela (Lee Crawford), the dental hygienist who works for him. This upsets Molly all over again, but Mrs. Garrett and Blair talk to her, and convince her that her parents clearly love her, but it’s difficult to maintain a marriage when it just for the kids’ sake. Molly eventually agrees and apologizes for being so stubborn, and admits that she had called her mother. Her father says they’ll wait until her mother arrives and sees that everything is alright. He also tells her that her mother is seeing another man, and that she knows Angela and they get along fine. Mr. Bradley cancels his Hawaii flight and returns to make sure that Molly is okay, then realizing that all was settled and he skipped his trip for nothing. 1/22/22
  • 013. Dope – 6/11/1980
    • As Mr. Bradley considers using funds to buy a new stereo for the dorm room, Blair tells Sue Ann that ‘the group’ – an elite group of Eastland girls – are going to let her into their exclusive club. Tootie overhears them talking about the club, and although she is too young to get into the club, she wants to join her own group with Natalie. Two girls from another dorm, Tumpy (Hillary Horan) and Emily (Helen Hunt) come over to see Sue Ann and officially announce her membership. Blair warns Sue Ann that the girls will want to smoke marijuana and that she should be prepared. Blair even has a fake tube of lipstick in which she is hiding a joint. Nancy is depressed because Blair couldn’t get into the group. They have a gathering that night at the other dorm, but Blair gets cold feet about trying the pot. Tootie manages to get inside briefly by using the secret knock. While inside she sees the girls’ pot bongs, but they tell her that they are jelly bean holders. Sue Ann goes forward with smoking the pot, after hearing them all telling Blair that she is a chicken. The next morning, Sue Ann wakes up sick as a dog. Tootie and Natalie go to the record shop to buy some bongs, which they bring back and show Mrs. Garrett, still thinking they are jelly bean holders. Mrs. Garrett immediately takes the information to Mr. Bradley, who does searches everyone’s property. Tumpy and Emily are expelled from school when he finds their contraband. He finds the fake lipstick in Blair’s purse, and Sue Ann is about to take the fall for her, but by this time, she had gotten rid of the joint and tells him that it is for mad money. Sue Ann and Blair apologize to each other, and they vow not to do drugs. 6/2/22

SEASON 2

Theme song: “The Facts of Life” written by Al Burton, Gloria Loring, and Alan Thicke. Sang by Gloria Loring. 

  • 014. The New Girl: Part 1 – 11/19/1980
    • Summer is over and some of the girls are returning to Eastland. Mrs. Garrett has lost 25 pounds and is now working as the Eastland dietician. She also has Arnold Jackson with her at Eastland while he is off school. Blair, Natalie, and Tootie all reunite and new girl named Jo Polniaczek (Nancy McKeon), who rides a motorcycle and dresses like a hood, shows up for school. She and Blair get off on the wrong foot immediately when Blair makes fun of her name and her attire, and Jo goes on the defensive and counters with put-downs about how superficial Blair is. Mrs. Garrett tells Blair that she has assigned Jo to be her roommate because it will take someone who has it all together like Blair to help Jo get back on track. Jo’s parents recently divorced and Jo would up with a boyfriend who wasn’t a good influence on her. Blair agrees to show Jo some charity, but Jo sees it as condescending. They then get into another fight when Jo make fun of the ‘children’ who Blair dates. Jo challenges her to see who can get the better man by using fake IDs and going to a local bar called The Chugalug Bar. Tootie and Natalie decide they also want to go along, but only to observe from the window. They agree to let her go so she won’t tell on them. To get there, they hotwire the school van. They are able to get by the bouncer (Reb Brown) with their fake IDs. An older man named Brad hits on the girls, but winds up creeping them out. Eventually he reveals himself to be an undercover officer Barry Shuler (Peter Fox). Back at Eastland, Arnold, who is hoping to spend more time with his crush Tootie, tells Mrs. Garrett that he saw them all leaving in the school van. Mrs. Garrett shows up and tries to keep the officer from arresting them, but when Tootie pours beer over his head, he arrests everyone. In addition, they have parked the van on a one-way alley, and another car crashes into it. NOTE: This is the first of a two-part episode. 6/2/22
  • 015. The New Girl: Part 2 – 11/26/1980
    • The girls are put in jail where they run afoul of another tough girl (Susie Goddard) in for robbery and assault. The girl attempt to steal Blair’s watch, but Jo comes to Blair’s rescue and intimidates the girl into leaving her alone. Mrs. Garrett comes in and tells the girls that they are all sprung by a judge who plays golf with their headmaster Mr. Harris. However, they are now on probation and have been expelled, unless they agree to the stipulation that they move out of the dorm and into the storage room across the hall from Mrs. Garrett, and that they work in the cafeteria until they pay off the van that they damaged. Natalie, Tootie, and Blair are all willing, but Jo thinks she’d rather go back to New York to be with her boyfriend Eddie, who she’s been with for three and a half weeks. Unfortunately, her motorcycle is all taken apart and she has no way to get back there. They come back to the cafeteria where they tell Howard (Hugh Gillin) the chef that the positions around the kitchen have been filled. Another attractive boy (Rene Lamart) comes in to apply, and as much as the girls would like him to stay, Howard has to tell him that the positions have been filled. Mrs. Garrett then shows them the storage room where their quarters will now be. They are all disappointed that they need to cram into one room, and that it will take so much work to clean up. Jo again considers leaving, telling the other girls that one of the reasons her mother sent her to Eastland was to get her away from her boyfriend Eddie. Their work is exhausting in the kitchen and they are having a hard time staying awake in class. Molly comes into the cafeteria with a smart aleck girl named Margo (Amy Gibson), who especially belittling to Jo. When she makes a crack about Jo’s mother, she nearly attacks her. She is stopped by Blair, who then smashes a pie in Margo’s face. This is the last straw for Jo and she starts packing to leave. Blair is disappointed because she thought they were becoming a team, but Jo emphatically says they are not. Mrs. Garrett tells her that she is free to leave, but reminds them all of how she went out on a limb for them. She also makes Jo feel guilty about the struggles her mother had raising her as a single parent, and how she struggled with hard jobs all of her life so Jo could go to school. Through tears, Jo changes her mind and says she’s staying out of respect for her mother. Blair tells the other girls that it is good news that Jo has decided to say. Bunny Summers is the female police officer. NOTE: This is the second of a two-part episode. 9/26/22
  • 016. The Double Standard – 12/10/1980
    • A boy named Harrison Andrews (Grant Wilson), whom Blair has known since they were young children, returns from Switzerland and transfers to the neighboring boys school Bates Academy. Blair has high hopes for dating him and hopes that their families will join bloodlines through them. She also expects that he will take her to the cotillion at the Highcrest Country Club. Harrison and Jo have a little bit in common when he talks about his Porsche, and she talks about her motorcycle. Jo goes to the arcade that night, while Blair waits at home for Harrison to call and invite her to the cotillion, while the others play Scrabble. When he doesn’t call, Blair is livid… and even more so when Jo tells her that Harrison showed up and followed her around until she agreed to go to some ‘shindig’ with her. Blair is appalled and incredulous that she would ask Jo over her. Jo quickly offers to back off, but Blair is insulted that Jo thinks he could prefer her. The two nearly come to blows, so Jo decides to go to the dance after all. She gets herself a dress, which Blair refers to as a ‘peasant’s dress’. Joe goes off to the dance, while Natalie and Tootie speculate what they are doing at that moment. Blair is inconsolable and cries on the bed, kicking and screaming. Jo comes to see Mrs. Garret in her room, with her hair down and missing a shoe. She tells Mrs. Garrett that Harrison took her right through the club, and out the back door onto the golf course and tries to have his way with her. Mrs. Garrett consoles a tearful Jo, who says she never expected anything like this from a supposed gentleman. Mrs. Garrett tells her that she is proud of how she handled him, but says she almost wishes she had hit him. It turns out that she did hit him with her other shoe. Later that night, Harrison shows up with Jo’s shoe and asks Tootie and Natalie to return it. Blair finds him there and berates him for going out with Jo instead of her. He explains that what he ‘needed’ that night was something he wouldn’t have subjected Blair to, since she is the type of woman he would marry, while Jo is disposable. Jo overhears this and tells Blair that she already hit him, but Blair is so upset the way he insulted Jo that she is dying hit him too. Jo holds her back, and the two realize they have some common ground in the way men have tries to be all over them. 9/27/22
  • 017. Who Am I? – 12/17/1980
    • There is a dance contest coming up at Eastland, and Natalie is scared to ask her crush Alan to go with her, while Tootie is a shoo-in to win again with her partner Carl (David Coburn). Meanwhile, Tootie has been drawing designs for dresses and would like to make one but can’t afford the material. Blair offers to turn over some fabric from Hong Kong that her father sent her, so Tootie can create a dress for Blair to win at the dance. A new boy named Fred (Erik Moses) shows up to fill the candy machines for his uncle Mr. Johnson, and Tootie develops a quick crush on him. When she finally gets a chance to be alone with him, he starts asking invasive questions about Tootie going to a nearly all-white school. Tootie thinks Fred is out of line, but he keeps it up, especially when he hears that Tootie is making Blair’s dress. Tootie doesn’t pay much mind to him, but she starts to misconstrue certain comments from her friends. She then tells Carl that she can’t be his partner this year. When Mrs. Garrett questions this, Tootie admits to her that she is confused about being a black girl getting a white education. She starts to pull away from her friends, and when Alan accepts Natalie’s invitation to the dance, she holds back celebrating with her. Tootie winds up making an African galabia dress complete with a kilemba head dress in order to ensure everyone knows it was made by a black person. Then Tootie invites some black friends named Julia (Tan Adams), Madge (Shawnte Northcutte), and Terry (Cheryl Epps) so they can talk about their commonalities. Unfortunately, her new friends have more in common with some of her white friends than they do with Tootie. Mrs. Garrett tries to tell Tootie that you can’t whip up friends at the drop of a hat and reminds her that she has plenty of close friends already, even though Fred is trying to tell her that she needs to be friends with her own kind. Tootie brings Fred to the dance, and he immediately makes fun of Blair’s new dress. Tootie also finds out quickly that Fred is a terrible dancer. She has a change of heart and tells Fred that she is going to dance with Carl and win the contest, and then celebrate with Fred. She tells Fred that she wants to be herself, and that picking him as a friend proves that she’s good at picking friends. Tootie and Carl take the dance floor, and Fred is more accepting than he started out. Tim Clark and Gary Dubin are the unfortunate boys who try to talk to Jo. 1/19/23
  • 018. Cousin Geri – 12/24/1980
    • Blair winds the Fine Arts Festival first place prize for her painting for the third year in a row. She is excited to be honored at a victory dinner that night, but she gets some news that shakes her: her cousin Geri Warner (Geri Jewell) is playing her comedy act at the nearby Peakskill Moose Lodge and is coming to visit. Mrs. Garrett has invited her to come to the ceremony and to stay the night at the school. Blair seems disturbed by this, and Tootie overhears her calling her mother and asking why Geri has to come. When Geri shows up, she is handicapped by cerebral palsy. Geri has incorporated her affliction in her comedy act, so she both cracks plenty of jokes about it, as well as answering the girls’ questions about the disease. Blair goes up to her room to paint and leaves Geri with the others, all of whom get along with her. The cook Howard even offers Geri some jokes to use in her act. Jo reads Blair the riot act about ignoring her cousin, and Mrs. Garret also tells Blair that she is being very rude and suggests that she go spend time with her cousin. Initially everyone thinks that Blair is embarrassed by her cousin Geri, but as Blair reveals that Geri is always the center of attention at home, Mrs. Garrett realizes that Blair is actually jealous of her. Back home, Blair says she’s glad to let her get the attention, but she’s afraid that her art award will be perceived as insignificant with Geri around. Blair asks Mrs. Garrett to stop talking about Geri and insists on some time to herself. During the dinner, everyone wants Geri to do her comedy act, but Geri doesn’t think it is a good idea to get on the stage on Blair’s night when Blair isn’t even there. Jo tries to guilt Geri into performing, since they fed her and put her up at the school, so Geri finally gets on the stage. She begins her act successfully, and midway through, Blair joins her onstage. They start doing the routine of Tea for Two interspersed with jokes that they have doing since they were kids. Blair then tells her how terrific she is, and Geri tells her that she loves her. Before things get too sappy, Mrs. Garrett breaks back into Tea for Two. 1/19/23
  • 019. Shoplifting – 12/31/1980
    • The girls find out that it is Mrs. Garrett’s birthday when Tootie overhears her talking to her son on the phone. This is later verified by Mrs. Garrett herself when she decides to make a birthday cake to celebrate. They all decide to chip in so that they can buy her a gift, but Blair decides she wants to buy her own gift. She offers to add the other girls’ names, but Jo wants to fund her own gift, and Natalie and Tootie decide to piggyback on the gift as well. They find out that there is a half-price sale at Harrison’s, and they know they hear that Mrs. Garrett wants a Hawaiian print blouse. They go to the store to pick on out, but the saleslady (Hazel Shermet) tells them that sale was for one day only. Feeling ripped out by the store, Jo decides to steal the blouse so she goes into the changing room and puts it on under her jacket. A guard (Brad Trumbull) stops them on their way out, but it is only to tell them to use a different exit. Blair gives Mrs. Garrett and Gucci handbag and then the other girls present her with the blouse. Mrs. Garrett loves it, but Blair convinces her that it is a little too small now that she has lost some of her weight, and that she should try to exchange it for a smaller blouse. When she goes to Harrison’s to do so, the saleslady tips off the store security man Henry Douglas (Dick O’Neill) that Mrs. Garrett is returning the stolen blouse. He follows her around the store, but Mrs. Garrett thinks he is flirting with her, up until the time that he puts her under arrest. When Mrs. Garrett returns, she gives the girls a guilt trip about how nice they were to spend their hard-earned money on her gift. Tootie and Natalie can’t take it anymore and confess to stealing the blouse. Jo then admits that she acted alone in stealing it, and explains the reason she did it, adding to the fact that she had been felling really close with Mrs. Garrett, but she responds by telling her how gifts themselves don’t mean much too her, while it is the thought that makes her feel good. Jo feels terrible about what she did, but Mrs. Garrett tells her that she’ll have the dress after all, as she has put in on layaway and Jo will pay it off by working weekends at Harrison’s while she is grounded for the month. While Jo is working, Natalie and Tootie will do Jo’s weekend chores. Mrs. Garrett admits that she still had a happy birthday, especially when she made a date with Mr. Douglass after he questioned her. 7/5/23
  • 020. Teenage Marriage: Part 1 – 1/7/1981
    • Jo joins the debating team that Blair is already on, and will be debating the boys from the Bates Academy soon. When Mrs. Garrett suggests meeting some of the attractive Bates boys, Jo reminds everyone that she has a boyfriend named Eddie Brennan (Clark Brandon), stationed in Chicago at the Great Lakes Naval Training Center. Jo calls her mother Rose to invite her to come see her debate. However, when a guy named Jack answers the phone, Jo realizes that Jack is living with her. She thinks this is the reason she got shipped to Eastland. Mrs. Garrett suggests that Jo call her back to talk about it, but Jo calls Eddie instead. Eddie goes A.W.O.L. and heads to visit Jo. He then asks Jo to marry him and run away, and Jo tells him that she will think it over. Blair tries to talk her out of doing anything too rash at the age of sixteen, but when Jo refuses to listen, With the proposal on her mind, Jo can’t concentrate on the debate and their team loses. Blair decides to recruit the head debater from the Bates debating team, Bink Parker (Brian Fuld) and then invite Jo and Eddie out at an expensive French restaurant. When Eddie realizes that his bill is going to be more than he has, Bink tells him that he will loan him the money, and then proceeds to lecture him using the restaurant bill as an analogy of teenage marriage. Back at Eastland, Mrs. Garrett makes a call to Jo’s mother. Jo drags Blair off to the restroom and yells at her for planning the attack on their marriage ideas. She tells Blair that she was going to tell Eddie no, but now that she sees that he is the only one she can trust, she is going to say yes. She tells Eddie that she accepts his proposal. Bella Bruck is the women’s restroom attendant. Mark Savalle is the waiter. NOTE: This is the first of a two-part episode. 7/5/23
  • 021. Teenage Marriage: Part 2 – 1/14/1981
    • While Mrs. Garrett desperately tries to get ahold of Jo’s mother on the phone, Blair rushes back to Eastland to tell everyone that Blair is planning on leaving that night to get married in West Viriginia. Mrs. Garrett decides to try and stall Jo until her mother calls by throwing her a quick bridal shower before she takes off. She has Howard pull out a cake from the freezer and take Eddie to the Chug-a-Lug bar for a quick bachelor party. The girls put up some makeshift decorations and find gifts in their room to give her. Jo is still annoyed with Blair and doesn’t want her to attend the party. However, she warms up a bit when Blair gives her a peignoir from Sach’s 5th Avenue. Jo’s mother finally calls, but when Jo overhears Mrs. Garrett and Blair talk about how they successfully stalled her, she gets angry again and storms off. Howard reports that when she picked up Eddie, he talks her into not driving to West Virginia in the freezing weather. Jo and Eddie wind up in the sleazy Ritz Motel. Mrs. Garrett and Blair head there as well and confront the manager (Bill Dana) about which room they are in. Inside the room, Eddie starts to get romantic with Jo, and she responds that they need to be careful so she doesn’t get pregnant. She starts to talk about how she needs to finish high school so that she can go to college and get a job. Eddie tells her that he doesn’t want her to have to work, which leads to a conversation about money. As they are discussing this, Mrs. Garrett and Blair come to the door, which causes Jo to continue her anger toward them. Although Blair doesn’t want their help or advice, nor that of her mother, she does realize that if she and Eddie care about each other, they will wait to get married. When Eddie says, they don’t know where they’ll be in a few years, Jo notes that is all the more reason to wait. Eddie heads back to Chicago, and Mrs. Garrett and Blair comfort Jo. NOTE: This is the second of a two-part episode. 10/30/23
  • 022. Gossip – 1/21/1981
    • The older classes are getting ready to go on a field trip to New York City to the art galleries and museums, and Natalie is going along to do a report. However, Tootie is feeling left out since she is the only one who can’t go along. She tries to get some attention by introducing some gossip that the headmaster Mr. Harris (Kenneth Mars) is wearing a toupee. No one is impressed, although it is news to Mrs. Garrett. Later, Tootie overhears Blair telling Jo that she plans to sneak out from the hotel on Saturday night to go to a performance of Mikhail Baryshnikov with Nancy’s boyfriend Roger. Tootie immediately tells this gossip directly to Nancy, and then shares it with Natalie, Cindy, and Sue Ann as well. Nancy naturally confronts Blair about it, and Blair thinks that it was Jo who spilled the beans to Nancy. She retaliates by accusing Jo of tattling her secret. Meanwhile, Mrs. Garrett goes to the eye doctor and has gets her pupils dilated, so when she comes home, she can hardly see and is stumbling through the school. Tootie thinks she is drunk and again tells Natalie, Cindy, and Sue Ann. Before long, the news of Mrs. Garrett’s supposed drunkenness works its way back to Mr. Harris. He finds this concerning and comes to see her. When he tells her that the rumor has gotten back to him, she assumes he means the rumor of the toupee. Finally, they get their wires uncrossed, and Mrs. Garrett deduces that the rumors must’ve been started by Tootie. Mrs. Garrett confronts Tootie and tells her that this could have led to her getting fired if it hasn’t been straightened out. She tells Tootie that her rumors might be getting attention, but they are leading to anger and resentments among the other girls, and that no one will trust her with any information if she keeps passing it along. Tootie makes a public confession about the truth of Mrs. Garrett’s drunken behavior, and the admits that it was her who gave away Blair’s secret. The girls are all furious with Tootie, but when Mrs. Garrett gives Tootie her punishment of sealing and stamping 1000 invitations to an alumni event, the other girls decide to pitch in and help her. 10/31/23
  • 023. Breaking Point – 1/28/1981
    • Blair is confident that she is going to win the upcoming Student Council presidential election, but a newer girl named Cynthia (Denise Halma) who has only been at Eastland for a few months seems to be close in the running. Blair acts as if she isn’t concerned, even when she realizes that her father is a diplomat and that she has lived all over the world and speaks fluent French, but she confides in Jo that if she loses, she’s not sure how to save face. Blair insists that she deserves the role because she wants to revolutionize Eastland by changing their school song. When the vote is finally counted, Blair learns that she has lost, and as runner-up will become the council’s vice president. Blair is inconsolable and acts like a sore loser, only offering sarcastic congratulations when Jo insists that she act like a good sport. When Cynthia finds out that her father is moving to Germany on a diplomatic mission, Blair perks up, thinking that she will be leaving too. However, she says that her parents think she should stay in one place in order to make friends and have a normal childhood. Cynthia gives Tootie her necklace and thanks her for being so nice to her, but Blair insinuates that it might be a bribe. Blair becomes even more depressed and cancels all of her dates for the weekend. Mrs. Garrett and Jo encourage her to let it out and cry, but Blair is unable to muster any real tears. Tootie then comes downstairs and tells her that she found Cynthia unconscious next to an empty bottle of pills. They call an ambulance and then wait to hear her status. Jo insists that she really didn’t want to kill herself or she would have picked a more foolproof way like her friend Gloria did when she jumped off a building. Mrs. Garrett then gets a call from the hospital letting her know that Cynthia has died. Each of the girls has a different reaction, but they all assist Mrs. Garrett in packing up her things and clearing out the room. Jo is angry, and soon Tootie joins her in the anger, opting to send back the necklace with all of her other things. Blair feels guilty for being so mean to her. Mrs. Garrett tries her best to comfort them and relate the true nature of teenage suffering, encouraging them all to be sure to talk to someone if they start to feel stressed or depressed. When Tootie wonders how girls who don’t have anyone to talk to can handle it, they all decide that the best use of Blair’s new presidency might be to start up a hotline for students who need to talk. Tootie decides to keep the necklace after all, as Mrs. Garrett shuts off the light in Cynthia’s empty room. 3/6/24
  • 024. Sex Symbol – 2/4/1981
    • Mrs. Garrett encourages Tootie and Natalie to be social at mixer with Bates Academy, so Natalie introduces herself to a shy sophomore named Neil Richards (Dan Spector). They set up a study date at the library for the next day, and Natalie has a such a good time that she stays there until after 6pm, worrying Tootie. She then tells the girls that Neil has asked her to go out on a real date, but she worries about running out of things to talk about on a longer, four-hour date. Blair offers to help coach her on how to make a boy putty in her hands. After the date, Natalie suddenly begins getting phone calls from other boys asking for dates. Blair hears from one of her boyfriends, Johnny, that the reason all of the boys are calling Natalie is because Neil has said that she was easy. Jo encourages violence against Neil, while Mrs. Garrett tells her she should never see any of those boys again. All of the girls seem to think that it is funny that anyone could think that Natalie is anything but a goodie-two-shoes in the first place. Natalie takes offense at their laughing, and when Neil calls to ask her out again, she agrees to see him. Soon the word gets out that Natalie is an easy and promiscuous date, and the other girls like Nancy, Cindy, and Sue Ann all start fanning the rumors, which puts Jo, Blair, and Tootie on the defensive in order to honor Natalie. However, Jo says that Natalie has created this by her own doing and tells her that she needs to stop. Some of the girls compare Natalie to ‘Homerun’ Helen (Holly Gagnier), who questions why Natalie would act this way since she is so popular. Natalie tells Helen that it has made her popular as well, but Helen says she’s not popular, just ‘busy.’ Mrs. Garrett tries to have a chat with Natalie to try and convince her that she doesn’t need to act this way in order to protest how other girls see her. Although she knows Natalie is not really acting on the rumors, she accuses her of perpetuating them. Neil comes to see Natalie and has to incur the wrath of Jo and Blair while waiting for her. Neil tells them that she is breaking his date with her because he’s started to hear the rumors that other guys are having their way with her. Natalie overhears him and accuses him of starting the rumors in the first place. He says that he had a reputation to protect, while she notes that he obviously didn’t care about hers. Neil is surprised when Natalie tells him that all of the other boys are lying just like he did. Neil admits that he was wrong and asks her to go out on a date again. She refuses his invitation… unless he will ‘un-tell’ all of the lies to his friends. He agrees to do so, and she looks forward to seeing him come back and grovel… because that will mean she can date him again. 3/6/24
  • 025. The Secret – 2/25/1981
    • Jo is getting ready to receive the Best New Student award at Eastland, and Blair is taking the credit for molding her into the student that she is. Tootie accidentally opens a letter from Jo’s father, whom Jo has said is living in Miami but is now revealed to be in the state prison. Mrs. Garrett takes the letter and delivers it to Jo, who is upset that the word might get out about him. In the letter, her father Charlie (Alex Rocco) is asking her to come visit him at the prison for his 40th birthday. Jo says she’s ignored many such requests, as he had abandoned the family, and it wasn’t until many years later that they found out he was in prison. Mrs. Garrett offers to drive her to Albany to see him, and Jo reluctantly agrees to take a chance. When she arrives at the prison, Jo doesn’t have many kind words to say to him and tells him that he was a lousy father. He tries to convince her that he has changed and wants to make things right, even telling her that he received a high school diploma while in prison. He now researches stocks and hopes to become a broker when he gets out, which will be soon since he is getting paroled. He also asks if he can come to see her receive her award. She agrees but makes him promise that he won’t talk too much and reveal his past to her friends. On the day of the event, Charlie shows up as promised, with Jo nervously telling him to keep his mouth shut. When Jo leaves the room, Charlie chats with Blair about her father’s company Warner Textile Mills and the research he did about his financial problems and how they were overcome. Blair talks to him about changing his career from being a truck driver to a stockbroker, but when Jo returns, she thinks they are talking about his time in prison. She lets him have it in front of her friends about how they now all know that he was in prison, when he hadn’t actually said a word. She tells him to get out of her life, but Mrs. Garrett insists that he try and talk to Jo instead of leaving when the going gets tough. Blair talks to Jo and says that not one of her three fathers ever came to see her get an award. Jo agrees to talk to him, but says she knows he would eventually run out on her again. He tells her that he loves her and asks if he will meet her halfway. Apparently, Jo softens her position as she asks Mrs. Garrett to save her father a seat next to her for the ceremony. 7/20/24
  • 026. Pretty Babies – 3/4/1981
    • coming soon…
  • 027. Bought and Sold – 3/11/1981
    • Mrs. Garrett has invited Willis Jackson to spend the weekend at Eastland with her, but his first task seems to be helping Blair pick up stacks of boxes of Countess Calvert beauty products from the post office. Blair has become a representative of the products, whose focus has recently been to sell them on the school campuses. However, after making her first attempt to sell product at the school, she comes back without having sold a single box. While Jo goes out to play basketball with Willis, Blair starts reading through the sales manual with Tootie to try and see what she can do to improve her salesmanship. When the book mentions that a dramatic example of a makeover could get the ball rolling, Blair immediately thinks Natalie might be a good guinea pig. She makes over Natalie and then invites her to attend her friend Debbie’s slumber party that night so that she can show her off. The plan works like a charm, and soon Blair is selling lots of product all over campus. However, Mrs. Garrett thinks the makeup is too much for Natalie, especially when she hears that Natalie has spend over $87 on it. She gives her pointers about other less expensive beauty treatments with everyday items like cucumbers and eggs. Blair gets word that Count Calvet (Zsa Zsa Gabor) herself is coming to Eastland to visit with Blair. Natalie phones her mother to try and get the money to pay for the cosmetics, telling her that it is for a field trip with her best friend Blair. Tootie hears this and has her feelings hurt since she thought that she was her best friend. Tootie tries to tell Natalie that Blair is only using her since she is a walking billboard that is easier to tote around. When the Countess arrives at the school, Blair gives her the royal treatment and introduces her to everyone. She is polite and flattering to everyone, but when she sees Natalie, she is aghast that her face is drooping with makeup, even if it helped meet Blair’s sales quota. The countess tells Blair that makeup is supposed to make one look more natural and beautiful. She advises the girls not to wear her makeup until she comes out with her new line that is made especially for girls. After she leaves, Blair apologizes to Natalie for using her to do her advertising. Mrs. Garrett reminds Natalie that she was at fault too for trying to buy into Blair’s social life. Blair tells Natalie that she is going to give her a full refund, and Natalie says she’ll return the money to her mother. Blair decides that she has more success spending money rather than earning it. 7/20/24

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