Since I was on the “Dreams Come True” tour, by Monday, October 6, it was time to start making some of those so-called dreams actually come true. Every since I had found out that my friend Dick Bann had full access to Playboy Mansion West in the Holmby Hills area of Beverly Hills, I had been pestering him to take me there. Although he is a friend of Hugh Hefner and supplies the screening notes for the weekly film showing, there are still rules that he has to follow. And unfortunately he is unable to bring anyone in during one of the fabled wild parties throughout the week…that is, unless you are an exceptionally attractive girl. And I am not.
So I settled to have my first (and hopefully not last…yes it’s a pipe dream) visit to the Playboy Mansion occur on a Monday morning about the time that most of the household was waking up. Dick had cleared Jimmy and me for about 10am that morning. Typically Hef likes all strangers who are being given tours off the property by 10am – at which time he typically starts his day.
Jimmy and I picked up Dick at his apartment at 9:45am and drove the quick jaunt over to the Mansion arriving just before 10am. We pulled up to the gate and Dick announced us to the hidden speaker. The gates opened and we drove up the windy driveway and parked Jimmy’s car right behind Holly Madison’s red 1957 Corvette just in front of the front door of the mansion. For the next hour and a half, Dick give us a tour of the grounds. Other than not being able to go inside the actual mansion (after all it is a home, no matter how debaucherous), the only other rule was that if we saw any Playmates running about, not to take their photos as they were probably just waking up in the morning and deserved some privacy in their own home.
The gates open…
We started out on the grassy area in front of the house where Hefner had married Kimberly Conrad. Technically, these two are still married – and Hefner has purchased the house adjoining the property so their children can freely roam from one house to the other. Dick also gave us the lowdown scoop that had not yet broken in the news – that Hefner and the Girls Next Door trio had officially broken up. He was getting ready to replace them with two sets of twins and two other girls.
We then wound around a nice pathway that led us to the pet cemetery on the property where Hefner had laid to rest his beloved cats and dogs over the years. The path ended at another building which served as the mansion’s game room. It was well stocked with video games of the 1980’s, pinball machines – Playboy of course, a pool table, a bedroom, and couch and table with the three most recent issues of Playboy available for perusal, and a room with padded floors – just in case you (ahem) needed to lay down for a while. There was a restroom off of the padded room just in the unlikely event that you might need to wash up.
Dick and me with Hefner’s Walk of Fame star reproduction, in front of the path leading to the pet cemetery and the game room
Former Playboy pets
80’s video game heaven, including my favorite: Centipede
The Playboy Pinball Wizard
In the ‘padded’ room
The three of us then headed over to the indoor aviary which was full of exotic birds and reptiles. In fact there were many birds just freely roaming the property as well. The next building was interesting and looked to be a cavern upon entry. This led to a ‘relaxation’ area with fluffy pillows, the obligatory Playboy magazines, and a restroom. Down a narrow windy staircase was a state-of-the-art gym with every piece of workout equipment imaginable. There were also hot, nude Playmate photos adorning the wall – in case you needed some extra motivation. No pain, no gain.
Lovely toucan in the aviary
The workout equipment and some intruder in the mirror
Relaxing with some Playboy water after my workout…of walking up the gymnasium staircase
From the gym we headed to the famous pool area – and the world-renowned grotto. The grotto area did have a back entrance so we were able to get inside on foot. Although tempted to jump in for a photo op, I settled with dipping my hand in the pool. Afterall it wouldn’t be that much fun to be in there alone. And neither Jimmy nor Dick wanted to get in.
Although huge, the pool was still a little smaller than I pictured
In front of the famous grotto
If these walls could talk…
The backyard was being covered with black tarmac for an upcoming event so there was a lot of activity on the property. Dick, Jimmy, and I stood around for a while watching the workers, enjoying the view of the rear of the mansion, and in true geek fashion, discussing the recent Little Rascals DVD release.
The back of the mansion
We finished up the tour by walking through the zoo area where we enjoyed the antics of a cage full of tiny monkeys. The paths through the simian area wound through a wooded area where one of the state’s only redwood trees was located. Dick explained how this area would be lighted and decorated for the upcoming Halloween party. From here we snaked around the side of the house, taking a peek in the window where the weekly film screenings were held. Finally, we posed for some photos at the front entrance of the house where we had arrived, making sure to get Holly’s attractive Corvette in the shot.
I saw a monkey…and this guy was one of dozens
Dick and me with Holly’s Vette and the entrance to the mansion
So the million dollar question that I have most frequently been asked is: did you see any Playmates? Did you meet Hef? Well the answer is no, I did not meet Hef on this trip – although I have met him twice before (the first meeting can be seen here). But I did meet one of the Girls Next Door. As we were walking from the game room to the aviary, we spotted Kendra Wilkenson taking her famous dogs Martini and Raskal for their morning walk. Dick introduced us to her and we chatted for about five minutes, with Dick and Kendra understandably doing most of the talking. Topics included her flights between Los Angeles and New York, the most recent episode of the Girls Next Door and her efforts to ‘be funny’ with a wig, her favorite football team the San Diego Chargers, and my comments about the Cincinnati Bengals lack of performance this year. And for a while I stroked both of her puppies.
While heading toward the pool, we also saw and said hello to one of the sets of twins, but they were not Karissa and Kristina Shannon, the ones currently sweeping the headlines. Whether these two will be permanant fixtures at the mansion or not remains to be seen. I didn’t catch their names. As promised, although utterly tempted, I did not ask for or take any photos with any of the Playmates – but of course I have two witnesses if anyone needs validation to my hot famous girl encounters!
I hope you’ve enjoyed my visit to the Playboy Mansion. And now for the kicker…who would have thought that a visit to this iconic location would not be the big story of Monday morning?
Very nice.
Heidi Maynard
November 9th, 2008
Show off.
Oh, don’t be hard on yourself Brad. You are too an exceptionally attractive girl.
Chris
November 10th, 2008
Rosebud.
Randy Skretvedt
November 10th, 2008