I only jest with the title. I liked the sound of poking fun at Dom DeLuise since he did such a lousy job in the Laurel and Hardy tribute ‘documentary’ Laurel and Hardy – A Tribute to the Boys. But the truth is that Mr. Dom (pictured at left portraying Oliver Hardy, opposite Jim MacGeorge’s Stan Laurel) must be a fairly nice guy since he was kind enough to send me the legitimately autographed and inscribed glossy photo seen below. I received this on August 31, 1985, as a result of the letter I sent out on August 12, so it was a speedy response as well. This came along with a single signed notecard that also featured his little illustration as part of signature.
No, the real title of this posting should have been “Dom DeLuise…and also Some Failed Autograph Attempts.” Autograph buffs know that there are five cardinal sins in the collecting world (in order of most difficult to decipher): autopen, secretarial, intentional forgery for profit, rubber stamp, and preprint. I have received my share of all of these downers at one time or another. It’s a real letdown to think that you have an autograph secure in your collection, only to find out it is one of the aforementioned examples.
In these early days of autograph collecting, I was naive enough to think that whatever you got simply must be legitimate, but after becoming quite adept at the hobby, I have learned to weed out the garbage. These items are consigned to their own unique area in the back of my files, never to see the light of day. They ought to be ashamed of themselves. Here is a list of the worthless items I received as the result of requests through the end of 1985.
Mickey Rooney – I was very pleased that he signed my item and notecards and sent me an additional signed photo on August 21, until I found out they were all secretarials.
Bob Hope – He had a secretary that was nearly impeccible at reproducing his signature. I fell for it several times, but eventually banished them all to the fake autograph file – including the photo I received on August 10.
Hank Aaron – His autograph that I received on July 29 was a preprint, which I didn’t realize for the longest time.
Bill Cosby – The autograph I received on October 1 was a secretarial for sure, but I later got a legitimate one through the mail.
Ronald Reagan – I proudly displayed my letter from Reagan that I got back in 1983, until I realized it was an autopen. The one I received on January 28, 1986, however was a preprint.
Sammy Davis Jr. – Secretarial, unfortunately – received on March 27, 1986.
Dean Martin – Particularly disheartening that my signed photo of Martin and Lewis featured the signatures of both of their secretaries. Martin’s came back on March 1, 1986.
Frank Sinatra – This was a no brainer. Obviously a secretarial. It seemed the Rat Pack had better things to do. This piece of crap was delivered on January 4, 1986.
Ted Knight – He always made a fuss about how much he appreciated his fans. But not enough, I guess, to send a legitimate signature instead of a preprint. This arrived on February 27, 1986.
Lucille Ball – A preprinted photo arrived on September 20, 1986 – but I am convinced that the notecards she signed were legitimate (see below).
Red Skelton – Same with him. The photo that came back August 9 contained a rubber stamped signature. But the two notecards had real autographs on them. Good thing I always enclosed those! (see below).
Other disappointments: No responses from Tony Curtis, Milton Berle, Sid Ceasar, Walter Mondale, Wally Albright, Dabney Coleman, Alvin Childress, and Gale Storm (where I lost an importantant autograph – highlighted here).
I had the wrong addresses on the following: Richard Dreyfuss, Jackie Davis, Tim Conway (twice), Art Carney (rectified as highlighted here), and Michael Landon.
More autographs of 1985 to come…
Leave a Reply